defining normal by example of NOT normal

Before I had even responded to Narcey's text message, I looked at care.com.  Were there any normal teachers out there in search of a sitter mid-year?  What to my wondering eyes did appear . . . a job posting by someone named 'Narcey' looking to hire a nanny for in her home.  Aha!

First of all, her text message requested that I call her.  I didn't think there was much to talk about in the first place.  Now, why would I call her when I knew that she was already looking for a nanny to come to her house?  She posted her job listing 3 hours after her rant in my kitchen AND before she ever texted me requesting to talk.

I was in disbelief.  I turned other families away over the summer because I had no more space.  I had to wonder if those other families were more mainstream than these wack-a-doodles.  It is hard to know when offering to babysit for people whether or not they will be 'normal.'  While everyone defines 'normal' differently, the other 4 moms/dads I sit for are classic 'normal'.  Thank God.

These moms give me a heads up if I need to know anything about their kids, which is rare.  (ie:  Didn't sleep well, must be getting teeth, etc.).  They appreciate my care.  They chat about what we did during the day at pick-up.  Ask me if I need more diapers.  Let me know in advance when the baby/tot won't be there because grandma is visiting, etc.

Here is what I found NOT normal about Narcey and her husband Arrogant:

1.  'No thank you':  They say this over and over, but not when they are uninterested in eating a food.  'No thAnk you' for unacceptable behavior.  For example, one kid hits another kid.  Kid that got hit:  'No thank you.'  I find it bazaar.  They never say, 'Please don't do that.'  'Stop it.'

2.  sock removal:  The kids started here in the summer and the parents would arrive and have them take their shoes and socks off in my mudroom.  Whenever we wanted to go outside, which was often, I had to help all of them put their socks back on.  So strange.  The kids said it was so they could climb things better.  I told them to keep their socks on.

3.  kid is a puker:  Zach has struggled to keep his food down.  I could write an entire post about it.  He would sit and eat lunch and suddenly puke on my table.  He started out in August eating at the same pace as the other kids, then he lost his appetite and would vomit - not everyday, but sometimes.  His folks said it was nerves.  He did it at home too.  On days when he didn't puke, it would take him FOREVER to eat.  I had to start lunch so early so that he could eat something before the preschool bus. 

4.  'My dad's car is nicer than yours.'  Arrogant drives a Tesla.  He usually picks up.  He stands on the driveway and opens the trunk where two of the kids sit.  He makes a big production about opening the hood, the doors.  It's like a car show every day.  The 6 year old, Matt, told one of the other moms once, 'Is that your car?  My dad's car is nicer than yours.'

5.  sideways glances while loudly commenting on child's advanced mathematical skills:  Nacrey told me when we met that her oldest, Matt, is very good at math.  The first few days that Matt was in kindergarten, she would ask Matt questions about whether or not the kids on the bus or the teachers had noticed his math gift yet.  All the time she grilled him, she would glance to the side at me to see if I was picking up on it.  'So, did the teacher give you more 4th grade math sheets to do?'

AND THAT'S JUST THE BEGINNING, you go ahead and think holiday thoughts.  Don't mind me - I will just continue to share this family's weirdness
. . .