What's for dinner? Oh, well . . . where is it?

The weekend after St. Paddy's day, Lad went to a parade with Finn and was gone most of the day. When he came home, I was in the study. Coach was picking up Reg at basketball. Curly and Coach and I had just eaten dinner. The weather was beautiful, so Coach grilled burgers. Mini was hanging out with a friend, but was eating at home later. 

I pointed out to Lad that he hadn't done laundry in two weeks and he needed to get it DONE. He ran upstairs to start his laundry.  

When he came downstairs, he asked:  DID DAD COME HOME WITH REG? 

Me:  NO, WHY?

Lad:  WHO PUT THE EXTRA BURGERS AWAY? 

Me:  HUH? NO ONE. THEY'RE ON A PLATE ON THE ISLAND. 

Lad:  THEY AREN'T HERE.

Something clicked in my brain. I froze. 

Me:  FINN ATE THEM. LAD, HE MUST'VE EATEN THE BURGERS.

That dog ate our dinner. There were about 12 burgers waiting to be eaten, or put in the fridge as leftovers. I made Lad call his father to share the news with him. Mini came home next. Her mouth was an O shape for awhile. 

Mini:  OMG - DAD TEXTED ME A PICTURE OF THE BURGERS WHILE I WAS WITH MY FRIEND. HE WAS SO EXCITED THAT HE'D GRILLED FOR DINNER. (* we don't eat burgers until it isn't below zero out and it's always a celebration for our offspring when burgers are on the menu again)

I called Coach a minute later. JUST GET REG A CULVER'S BURGER ON YOUR WAY HOME. MINI DOESN'T WANT ANYTHING. (she didn't want to add to his frustration by requiring a takeout burger).                                                 

That dog. THAT DOG! 

                                        I mean he did tolerate THIS. (6 SECOND VIDEO)

Remember when I mentioned that Finn interfered with my sleep recently. Details:

* Ingesting a squeaker. Finn ate a squeaker out of his toy one night. Coach was out of town. Lad sort of shrugged it off. Claimed he googled it. I went to bed and googled it myself as I was getting ready for bed. I rushed downstairs:  WHAT DID YOU READ? BECAUSE I'M READING THAT YOU HAVE 2 HOURS BEFORE IT HITS HIS INTENSTINES AND IT CAN END BADLY. Lad called the ER, took him there to have his stomach pumped. I went to sleep but woke up in the middle of the night for awhile worried. He was fine. I have begged Lad to toss out the cheap-ass toys. I think he finally did. 

* Introducing a new crate/cage. Lad bought Finn a new cage that all of the Shenanigans could fit in if we ever felt like creating our own escape room. Don't worry, I don't think that'll happen, but enjoy the visual of all the Shenanigans in Finn's large-ass cage. Just saying Hu-UGE. I don't think Finn likes it, preferred the cozy feeling of the smaller crate. Or, he has just figured out that if he whines and barks like the house is under attack, by killer yip-yip dogs or something, someone will let him out, even though his owner manages to sleep through these early morning freak outs. I've woken up EARLY a handful of times due to this unpleasant issue. 

Someone appears to be overstaying his welcome. What has your pet eaten? Does your dog prefer a small crate? Anyone know of a decently priced condo for sale in the Chicago burbs? wink, wink. 

odds and ends: why I need my sleep

Back at the 3 point contest:  I was so tired, I wasn't myself. We loaded the car to head the 1.5 miles to the competition and I decided to heat up my muffin. I live in fear of not having food. What if Reg advanced and we were there longer than anticipated? I ran to the kitchen area and cooked my frozen muffin in the microwave.

We got to the venue. My trusty water bottle was not in my drink holder. I'd left it at the hotel, next to the microwave. Coach and the kids hopped out and I drove back to claim it. We had plenty of time before the competition. 

I ran inside. It wasn't there. I asked at the desk if someone turned it in. They hadn't. Who would want someone else's water bottle? Gross. 

Remember my water bottle? RIP. It had my college sticker on it. Who would want it? Thank goodness for Amazon. A replacement arrived the next day for $20. I need to repurchase a sticker for it.

I raced back to the car, and couldn't get the valet key thing open to get the key out. The clicker doesn't work anymore. I couldn't get into my car. Panic mode - me, not my car's panic button. 

I ran inside, bumped into a janitor, asked for help. Maybe a tool to break open the valet thing? As he was fumbling with it, I noticed that the key was on the ring ALREADY out of the valet. These were Coach's keys, not mine. My key stays in the valet piece. No wonder it wouldn't pop the key out - it wasn't in there. Sheesh, embarrassing.

It was crazy cold. I drove back to the stadium, waited in line at security. They wouldn't let me in because I was carrying my new purse. I had to ditch my purse in my car. (FREEZING OUT). Clear purses only. 

I wanted to say, HEY, I JUST DID A POST ABOUT PURSES AND NO ONE SUGGESTED A CLEAR PURSE. YOU ARE NOT TREND SETTERS. HMPF.

My wallet - not allowed. I grabbed my credit card, a protein bar, and emptied a water bottle so I could fill it up inside. I emptied my pockets before walking through security and STILL set off the beeper. They had to check me with a wand. I was very close to taking that wand . . . well, I finally was allowed to enter and no one ended up with a security wand inserted where the sun don't shine. Coach hadn't thought to tell me I couldn't bring my purse in. I was in tears by the time I got near our seats. Evidence:  I need my sleep. 

What have you left at a hotel? What dumb things do you do when you have been sleep deprived? 

other sleep issues and hotel mix up

In addition to steroid pack, other sleep issues: 

1. Job related stress. As you know, it's been a rough stretch and you still don't even REALLY know what started the mess, but I will share soon. Since when does caring for cute cuddle bugs lead to stress? Stupid people, that's how. Just like most stress, in my opinion, - generated by stupid people. 

2. Hotel mix up. (see below)

I may or may not be a walking
meme while in Europe. I texted
 Mini this photo from the mall,
 asking if she felt I was worthy of
 wearing it. I have to share
her response in another post.

3. Finnegan - story coming soon. 

4. Maybe I eat TOO healthy, or maybe I eat something that touched gluten at some point, or stared at gluten in the pantry. No idea, but sometimes I don't sleep because my insides want me awake. I can't pinpoint it. And it isn't an acute bathroom issue, like I don't wake up and RACE to the bathroom. *we'll leave it at that out of fear that further discussion might mean we aren't friends anymore* It's just my body going YEAH, THAT WAS A LOT OF (fill in blank here) any number of things:  fiber, dairy, gluten-ish something?

Then . . . I NEED TO BE AWAKE WHILE MY BODY IS THINKING THINGS OVER. I fear that it's onions and peppers, and guess who likes onions and peppers? Do I need to eat earlier? I try to wrap up my eating by 5-ish and that tends to help, but it isn't always possible. Is it just that I'm old? Hormones/menopause? 

Sweet mother, so annoying. If you have an answer or a suggestion please enlighten me.

*******

3 POINT CONTEST - NOT SCORING IN THE HOTEL DEPARMENT: 

When we took Reg to the state finals 3 point contest, we arrived at the Hyatt Place at 9 pm. The athletic director at the high school made the reservations. There were 4 rooms for our high school participants/coaches. We were the last to check in. All the hotel rooms with two beds were gone. They were going to give us a king. 

Me:  UM, THERE ARE 4 OF US. (he claimed the room had a 'queen' sized pullout - it was a double)

Hotel guy:  SORRY, BUT CHECK IN WAS HOURS AGO.

Now, hold the phone. I've stayed in many, many hotels in my life. Never did they say I missed the boat because I hadn't called to say I wouldn't be there to check-in at 3 pm. What? This wasn't a dinner party where I was considered rude for not calling ahead to say I'd be late. Right? 

I hoped he'd find us a room with two beds, but finally I said we'd make it work. Remember this was the day the control people fired me and I'd been so focused on pleasing them and waking the bubble baby and I hadn't slept much the night before. I neglected to think clearly and pack an air mattress or a sleeping bag.

We entered our hotel room and 

SOMEONE'S STUFF WAS IN OUR ROOM. 

Let's pause here a moment to be grateful that we saw someone's stuff and NOT someone's junk .  .  . if you get my drift. There were no naked people or people doing things that many people who don't travel with children might do in a hotel room, knowing that they were alone and enjoying privacy. 

Reg recognized the winter coat tossed on a chair. It belonged to his assistant coach. All the high school basketball teams who were competing for the championship were staying at this hotel and the place was a madhouse. I went back down to the desk to get a new key. Hotel guy wasn't sure which of the 4 rooms reserved for our group was unoccupied. 

Me (to myself):  ARE YOU USING YOUR COMPUTER TO SEND YOUR MOM EMAILS? CHECKING SOCIAL MEDIA? PLAYING SOLITAIRE? WHAT IS THE POINT OF A COMPUTER SYSTEM IF YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT ROOMS ARE OCCUPIED? 

This was getting entertaining. Hotel guy and I went back up to the floor where my fam was standing in the hallway. It took a while to get an elevator, see above:  MADHOUSE. I'd left them there, assuming incorrectly that the 4 rooms for our group were on the same floor and hoping to alleviate dragging our stuff back to the lobby. Hotel guy took us to another floor and what was behind that magic door? A vacant room. Hooray.

I wanted Reg to have a good night sleep, so I told him to share the king with Coach. Curly said she'd just sleep on cushions on the floor. I took the full size pullout, but first encouraged Curly to share it with me. She said she was fine. We had no sleeping bag, but we'd gotten extra begging from the front desk.

Curly woke up freezing during the night. Stupid me - I'd brought a blanket up from the car just in case and failed to give it to her. Have I mentioned I hadn't slept well the night before? And that I'd just been fired? My brain was misfiring. When Curly crawled in bed with me, I woke up. I turned up the heat, put my winter coat on her, and lay awake the rest of the night. My mind replaying what I wanted to say to those ass-hats. I might've finally dozed off for 30 minutes before it was time to wake up. 

Who has visited Budapest? We're also going to Vienna and Prague, a few days each. Anyone traveled to Europe? Favorite place? Anyone else get assigned a hotel room with people in it? What messes with your sleep?

travel and pinkies

I've had a bit of a rough time sleeping lately. (I started to write this last night, and then I slept for 9 hours, the brain fog has cleared. Hooray). It's been a case of IF IT'S NOT ONE THING IT'S ANOTHER . . . (more on the other sleep issues in my next post).

2019

For starters, I saw a rheumatologist about my pinky fingers. 

*  Trust me when I say I feel silly talking about my ailing pinkies. I mean, what? It sounds so wussy. Like, get a real ailment. Am I right? To be clear:  HEY UNIVERSE:  I am not wishing for a real ailment - I'm just stating that it sounds silly. Also, I bet you don't realize how much you utilize your pinkies. I sure didn't. They seem like they could easily avoid heavy lifting, but I'm here to tell you that they do get called into service by default more than one might think. 

Anyway, they stared hurting in the fall of 2019. Remember when the doc get me groggy in order to go in and pop the cyst that she was blaming? Only the big-ass long needle just gabbed at my uselessly. There was no cyst. But hey, thanks for trying - because that was fun. 

I was groggy, but not groggy enough. This was her diagnosis  AFTER I had my ring cut off because she ordered a million MRI, x-ray, and what not type photos.

I gave up, but they really hurt. Coach urged me to go to a different doctor that a few of his patients rave about. He's a big deal, the doc not Coach. I went a few months ago, and you know what, I'd fake a sore knuckle just to hang out there. Delightful people at every turn, the doctor, who was interested in me and what I do for fun, etc., the nurse, the lady who drew my blood . . . and I think we all know how I crumble at the hands of a phlebotomist. I know spas are all the rage, but if I want a pick me up, you'll find me hanging at my rheumatologist's office even though I have to drive into the city to get there. 

2019 when I still wore
 my college ring. 

He suggested a steroid pack. I knew what this meant because I've tried those for asthma. They mess with my sleep. This round was no different. But hey, the pinky pain improved by like 80%. Wow. If the left one got bumped or grazed though, it still sent me through the roof. No pain when bending though. 

I think we also all know how much I LOVE my sleep. Not a long term fix.  

present day pinkie

Oh, and the good news is the doc ruled out arthritis (I'd had bloodwork done and I'd been told that I didn't have it, so not a surprise but he seems to know more stuff, so I was glad that he agreed) and he doesn't think this is gonna spread to the other joints. Hooray. 

Doc:  If it was gonna spread, what's it waiting for?

Cute, right? Like my knuckle-con-funkle has a personality. 

I've heard that celiac disease can mess with joints. He isn't sure that is the cause. 

Anyway, on my next visit we'll discuss what to try next. We tried steroids just to see what the pinkies would respond to. Sadly, I feel like since I finished that one week steroid pack the pain has intensified. Dang. 

*********

TRAVEL:

Speaking of sleep issues, my sleep might get messed up when  . . . Coach and I fly to Budapest. WHAT? We flew out on Tuesday, as in tomorrow. Fly home the 30th. 

I know, I never mentioned that we finalized our plans. Planning this trip was an undertaking. Coach's work schedule and our two different mindsets and us rarely in a room together to discuss  and him gone for 3 weekends in a row essentially - well, it's been a challenge.  But - we're going. Hoping I'll find GF options while there. Ed has been doing some research for me.

I'm not bringing all of this. This is my think-it-over pile. The weather looks great, 60's. I'm trying to remember what that's like and how to dress for it. 

I'm still posting while I'm away. My comments might be delayed, but I sure hope you still comment because how lovely to be in WIFI and realize that I have messages. Please pray that the kids behave and that Finn doesn't eat all the furniture or something.  

We were supposed to go to Florida over spring break, but we bumped that to April 12th (at night)- 16th. Near Fort Meyers, I think. Mini had no school two days because underclassmen like Reg are supposed to take PSAT. He's skipping PSAT. Then they're skipping Friday and Curly is skipping 3 days of 8th grade. Reg's coach for his new scout team is NOT happy. Reg misses 2 practices and a game. *Sigh* He'd told me when we registered that Reg couldn't skip when he is U17. He's U16 this year, so get off my back. 

Have you ever felt like you need a vacation after a vacation? Look at me, making that happen. Any doctors that you enjoy visiting? Maybe I just need to get out more so my doc office isn't my favorite place. 

the envelope please, drum roll . . . & other excitement

On Thursday last week, I had the day off. I was typing away in the study. A FedEx truck delivered something. I wasn't expecting anything. I kept typing. 

During my layover in Dallas a few weeks ago, I'd texted my friend, Dee Dee. WAVING TO YOU FROM THE AIRPORT. We'd decided to schedule a time to catch up. It was supposed to happen Thursday morning, but it didn't.

While I was typing, I got a text from her saying she could talk NOW. I happily stopped typing and wandered around the house folding laundry and cleaning bathroom countertops while we chatted.* (more on the funny thing that happened during this phone conversation later, too hard to explain here). I also opened the front door and picked up the FedEx envelope. It was from the Evans' Committee. 

*Gulp*

It was 2:00 - Mini would be home in an hour. At this point, I figured they wouldn't be sending a rejection via FedEx. We'd heard that they were thinking it was going to be hard to send her to Notre Dame. Her interview happened in the last group, so I wondered if the committee was running low on funds, trying to make their dollar stretch, etc. Secretly, I wondered if maybe they'd reach out to contributors or something to try to make her first choice possible. 

They'd said she'd hear in 2 weeks, but this was only one week. Seemed like they wouldn't have had time to scrape up enough to fund Notre Dame. Hey, a free ride is a free ride. I get that. Remember, there are layers to the whole Notre Dame situation. Her 2nd choice has an amazing business school:  Indiana U, where Ed goes. 

Coach works late on Thursdays, but he was home. He was leaving for a retreat for the weekend, so he came home early. The stars were aligned. 

Mini walked in and I was like ENVELOPE IS HERE. 

She was like I'M SO NERVOUS. *I took a video, but I was trying to be casual, so she wouldn't know I was taking a video of her, thus the weird angle.

Then she opened it and WE WON THE LOTTERY. 

We could not believe they agreed to send her to Notre Dame. Needless to say, she is over the moon. It seems so surreal. Pinch me. 

*******

Meanwhile, Reg participated in a three point contest end of Feb. He almost didn't go. He needed a ride back to school at 4:15 to catch a bus to this contest. I had a zoom appointment. Coach was out of town. Who knows where Mini was. I called Becky and asked if her daughter was available to drive him. Thank goodness her daughter agreed to drive Reg. 

*I paid her in pumpkin bread. Her favorite. The kids had their annual fundraising staff/student b-ball game and bake sale for their Global Humanitarian Club the night before. Guess who baked like crazy that week? I handed Reg a handful of bagged pumpkin bread:  GIVE HER THESE. 

Pumpkin bread is about to be considered a real, legitimate currency. Haven't you heard?

None of us went to the competition. It was at a school a distance from home. The 3 point thing was happening fairly early in the evening because it was before a playoff game (Reg's team had been knocked out of the playoffs).

Reg came home:  UM, I CAME IN 2ND PLACE AND I ADVANCED TO THE NEXT ROUND. I MADE 12 OUT OF 15 THREE POINTERS IN 45 SECONDS. ELEVEN OF THEM WERE IN A ROW.

Wow.

He competed at sectionals Friday night March 4th. Our high school was hosting. Curly, Lad, and I got to go. Coach was at the retreat. My mom showed up. Reg's godfather was there. Michael from church came with his dad. One of the families that I babysit for came to cheer Reg on. Delilah was there too. 

There were 20 kids eligible for this round, but only 16 showed up. During warmups Reg only missed a few times. He shot 10 out of 15 in the competition. He said afterward that he'd expected to score a few more than that. 

Guys who did great during warmups missed quite a few of their shots. Two kids tied with 9, but Reg's ten was the highest score. They took the top two kids, so the kids with 9 had a shoot out. Reg and another kid from our high school were there and freakishly, the two of them came in 1st and 2nd.

SO . . . Reg and the other kid from our high school advanced to the state 3 point contest. We go to University of Illinois on Saturday, March 12th*. Exciting. Delilah looked at me after he won:  BANNER WEEK FOR THE SHENANIGAN FAMILY. Very true. 

One of these guys is Reg. Hint:  he's the handsome one. 

*Updated to add:  Friday the 11th the family quit my daycare at 5:00, then I went to Curly's volleyball game, raced home, threw some stuff in a bag and drove with Curly, Coach, and Reg two hours to the hotel. I was tired from being awake at night trying to sort out their nonsense, and now I was ticked by how I was treated.

The contest was good - the hotel experience was unusual (more later), not Reg's best round. His shot looked a little off during warmups. 

In the competition he made 7 out of 15. Four kids made 9 and had to have a shoot out to advance. There might have been one kid with more than 9. Two kids advanced to the next round. If you don't feel like doing the math, Reg did NOT advance. It was a very cool experience, and he recognized that it was great to have made it that far.

Guesses on which one is Reg in the pic? Any guesses on what went wrong at the hotel? 

 

not my first rodeo

I apologize. I promised you Mini's scholarship update. That will be shared on Wed. I needed to share this ASAP, cuz this is a hot topic.

I had an opening in my home daycare. More on why in a later post, when I back up the bus to the beginning of the school year.  

I met 'Nurse' on FB moms page. We spoke. I usually sit for teachers. Her 4 day a week schedule rotates, so I wouldn't necessarily have Thursdays off. Nurse was supposed to drop 3 month old Bubble-boy, or BB, off at a KinderCare but as the time approached she was panicked, wanted to be a  little bigger before going there. 

* A few days later:  They were now thinking eventually they'd hire an au pair. Poor, poor au pair. 

I said, I'd babysit for him until the end of the school year. I described our outings/ routine. Not rocket science, but families I work for are crazy about me. I offered their contact info. She called all of them. 

Nurse wanted to bring BB before his 1st day for a few hours. Nurse asked me multiple times, HAVE YOU EVER WATCHED A 3 MONTH OLD BEOFRE? Like, what? 

No (insert sarcastic voice here), in 7 years of my day care, BB would be the first 3 month old. And I birthed all my kids at 6 months of age, so no experience. 

The two hour trial run:  Nurse and Hover Fool  (dad/ HF) arrived. They settled in on the couch. Huh? Drop and go, people. DROP AND GO. 

HF instructed me where to put my hands when holding BB. HUH?  They'd been surprised recently, BB cried when a friend held him, soon for stranger danger? 

* Turns out, BB was fed bottles in his room almost always and rarely left the house. It wasn't stranger danger, it was FEAR OF LEAVING HIS BUBBLE.

Eating:  They gave me a typed up schedule with a feeding position photo.  "more comfortable for him." She gives him breast milk in a bottle. She warms a bottle of breastmilk at night EVEN THOUGH SHE'S GOT IN ON TAP. 

Sleeping:  "Here's his magic suit." Think snowsuit, since he is too big for swaddling. It eliminates reflexes that could wake him. When I said I'd be keeping him in the dining room in a bassinet, she charged in there. 

Nurse:  running her hands over the bottom of the bassinet WELL, I'M NOT SURE IF THIS IS WIDE ENOUGH FOR HIM TO STRETCH HIS ARMS OUT. HE USUALLY LIKES TO SLEEP IN DARK ROOMS.

I guess he isn't bothered by
his arms not laying flat. 

Me (looks around to see if hidden cameras have been installed in my home, as in:  WHO IS PULLING MY LEG HERE, ARE THESE PEOPLE FOR REALS?) I can always put him in the study. I can close the shutters in there.

Did I want to use their video monitor? No. 

He likes the pacifier. They prefer he find his thumb. Um, he won't find his thumb if he can't bend his arm while in his puffy suit. 

They left. The bottle feeding wasn't ultra smooth - fed inclined on a pillow, his head towards my knees while he's on his side. No eye contact. No cuddling. 

Me afterward:  Do you expect me to wake him according to this schedule?

Nurse:  THIS IS WHAT WORKS FOR ME. I NEEDED HIM ON THIS SCHEDULE. YOU CAN DO WHAT WORKS.

Me:  (not about to lie) OK, CAUSE I DON'T WAKE SLEEPING BABIES. They do typically let you know what they need.  

Not my first rodeo. 

On Tues - DAY 1, HF arrived. Mini laughed at how he took everything out of the diaper bag. 'Splained to me what it was:  snot suction thing. Thanks, totally unfamiliar. 

BB cried or screamed every waking moment at my house. Fortunately the instant I laid him down in his DO-NOT-BEND suit with his pacifier, he slept. They brought a noise maker. HF demonstrated how to hit the button to get back to the preferred sound should I bump it. I was like, GOT IT. 

BB napped over 2 hours in the morning and around 2 hours in the afternoon. Most parents would be thrilled if their baby slept that well at a sitter's house. This.Is.Not.Most.Parents.

When HF picked up, he was distressed that I hadn't followed the schedule. BB had slept through the night a few nights prior to starting at my house. I think they feared deviating from their schedule, which was in military time:  0700 WAKE BB EVERY 1.5 HOURS. FEED BOTTLE. HOLD UPRIGHT 10 MINUTES. CHANGE DAIPER.

Super grateful for this info, because how else would I know when to change a diaper? 

DAY 2:  HF informed me BB'd had a terrible night (each morning he debriefed me on the night routine, # ounces ingested, etc), he demanded that I feed BB at exactly 11, 1 and 4. I reminded him that when we met, I pointed out that I wouldn't be waking the baby up. He was like WELL, WE CAN'T HAVE ANOTHER BAD NIGHT.

Me:  BB's adjusting to a new setting, not surprised he's a little thrown off. 

I was shaking when he left. I've NEVER been spoken to like that by a parent. They'd confused me with a personal nanny. I had 4 or 5 other kids to care for. I do what I can to meet everyone's needs. Not just BB's. 

I bent over backwards to follow their schedule. I called Delilah and I broke down, why so stressful? Why so rude? 

*********

On BB's first day, I'd noticed on FB someone looking for a sitter for a 2.5 year old, rest of school year, 2 days/week. I reached out. I could juggle people to Thursday to accommodate. I was also worried that BB wasn't going to work and was trying to cover my bases. 

When HF scolded me, after they'd said DO WHAT WORKS, but they meant:  OUR WAY OR THE HIGHWAY. I reached out to FB lady. I was like IF YOU HAVEN'T FOUND ANYONE - I WILL PROBABLY NOT BE SITTING FOR THIS BABY, I'LL HAVE SPACE. She'd already made other arrangements. Damn. 

**********

They'd chill out, right? It was an adjustment. I wanted to quit, thought about collecting BB's fat suit, etc and having it ready at the door, but worried about leaving them in a bind. Nurse called to chat and have me fill her in on how it was going. She worried HF wasn't telling her everything. "You can combine our strict schedule and your way." The next day I allowed 15 minute leeway to the strict schedule. 

Can we pause here and recognize that 3 MONTH OLDS DON'T HAVE SCHEUDLES. *sigh*

DAY 3:  Nurse picked up that night. I gave her homework:  Have someone other than you feed him. Take him somewhere, like the store. Try another position to feed him because how can I recreate that when we go to the zoo next week. She froze. 

When do I decide about outings? Sometimes morning of. I'd reviewed this when we met. One of the moms I sit for later told me that she'd stressed how much they love that we go places. Not new info. Nurse said she'd likely just hire a backup sitter for the day. I told her, great but you're going to pay me anyway, because we agreed to 4 days. Not going to skip out on using me because you aren't comfortable with something that I made clear from the get-go.

I also told her general rule is not to wake a sleeping baby. She told me there's lots of ideas nowadays. She's following one online, her sister follows another one. Who is this 'one' - an influencer? Curly:  SHE'S LEARNING HOW TO BE A MOM FROM THE INTERNET?

DAY 4, FRIDAY:  HF showed up:  SO WE THINK BB'S VOICE IS A LITTLE HORSE. I KNOW HE CRIED A LOT HERE. (me:  not yesterday, he's settling in, he cried the first 2 days), WELL, WE WEREN'T SURE IF MAYBE HE'S GETTING SOMETHING, SO WE GAVE HIM A LITTLE TYLEONOL. 

That evening at pickup, HF: "Nurse paid you, but we've decided to go in another direction." *as if they almost didn't pay me, and I should count my lucky stars that they did?  

I thought:  THIS IS A RELIEF. I BARELY SLEPT LAST NIGHT BECAUSE OF YOU PEOPLE. 

HF:  Just a difference of opinion. Plus we felt disrespected when you said, GENERAL RULE IS DON'T WAKE A SLEEPING BABY.

You felt what? Disrespected? Because I, an expert in my field, shared with you what most people already know?  I pointed out:  THIS IS THE WRONG SETTING FOR YOU.  He agreed. Why then, did you waste my time and energy? I could've filled the spot with someone else. 

HF:  HEY WE'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 3 MOS.

Me:  OH, I'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR OVER 25 YEARS. * been babysitting since age 12, probably since before HF was born. 

Me:  As a courtesy you can send me two weeks pay. 

HF:  WELL, WE WON'T BE DOING THAT.

Why? I want to know why? Because you don't value what I do? Because me caring for infants and toddlers and keeping them safe AND happy while their parents work is not essential and important? Really, because it seemed important and valuable enough for you to leave BB here. 

People, I'm hot. When I back up the bus and explain all that's gone on here - you will grasp why. I couldn't wait to tell it from the beginning, because I'm all kinds of fired up. The bottom line is:  they were dishonest. Turns out they DID care that he be kept on a crazy AF schedule. They DIDN'T want him to leave the house, but they knew I treated my charges to fun adventures. 

I've drafted a letter to them:  HEY DISHONEST FOLKS, WHO HAPPEN TO LIVE TWO BLOCKS FROM ME, HERE'S WHY THIS DIDN'T WORK (insert me 'splaining it) . . .  YOU WASTED MY TIME AND COST ME THE OPPORUTNITY TO WORK FOR SOMEONE WHO KNEW WHAT THEY NEEDED. 

I want to tell them to get a hobby. These people are future presidents of the HPA, helicopter parents association. BB is looking at a lifetime of being controlled. 

* If you were me, what's one line you'd include in a note to them? 

when an email or a cake can be a gift

MONDAY'S POST WILL UPDATE YOU ON MINI'S SCHOLARSHIP. ARE YOU ON THE EDGE OF YOUR SEAT? 

The night of my birthday (how did SO many things happen on my birthday? during a pandemic even) right before we watched Jim Gaffigan with the fam, I got an email from an elderly man from our church. He and his son Michael, who is special, attend our church. Michael is older than me by a few years. He's very high functioning and incredibly social. In his dad's words, he "was born mentally challenged". He's worked at the same grocery store for like 37 years. 

I don't even remember how we met. I think he approached Curly after mass to say that he liked her hair. Maybe about a year ago? Shortly after we could attend mass in person again while masked. We meet lots of people through 'the hair'. Michael started seeking us out each week to chat with us as we walked to our car after 5:30 pm mass on Saturdays. Turns out he has the same b-day as Reg. Reg texted him on his cave-isolation birthday. 

Michael likes to send cards. He sent Mini a get well card when she had covid. Way back in the fall when he asked Curly what she was up to, I shared Curly's school b-ball game schedule with Michael and his dad. They were excited to come to a game in our home gym that is only a few blocks from our church. 

People, they enjoyed that one game so much that they rarely missed a game for the rest of the season. They even when out of their way to attend her away games. I had to be sure to text them whenever there was a schedule change. I don't think I blogged about it, but Curly's team won every game but the first game when Curly apparently had a touch of the jitters. It was a very exciting season. Our school is small and not known for fielding a great team. Curly and one of her besties scored almost all of their points. 

See what I did here? I gave Curly a
mask that thankfully is more
 intense than what the
 pandemic calls for. 

After every game that Michael and his dad attended, Curly thanked them for coming. Michael had me take a photo of he with Curly after several games. 

Michael sat next to Reg at that first game. We didn't know him very well, other than to chat for a few minutes after church. Afterwards, Curly asked Reg how it went. Did Michael talk to him the entire game or ask too many questions? Was he OK to sit with at a game? Reg said he was fine to sit next to, that he knew the game and was excited each time she scored. I believe Reg said he preferred to sit next to Michael over me, as I cheer too loudly. Guilty as charged.

In that game, the first time Curly drove to the hoop and scored, or hit an outside shot, or something:

Michael:  OH, CURLY IS GOOD AT THIS. GO CURLY!

One of Curly's teammates has some issues. She didn't like a call the ref made. I mean, been there, right? But, most of us can recover after an unfavorable call. For this girl, well - it didn't end well. She refused to back down, hollered at the ref, and had to be escorted from the gym. She marched out while flipping off the entire gym full of people.

Michael's dad (with a chuckle):  WELL, I DIDN'T KNOW GIRLS' BASKETBALL WAS THIS EXCITING. WE'LL HAVE TO COME AND WATCH ANOTHER GAME. 

This loose cannon girl performed similarly at the one game that my in laws attended. Well. That was fun. They are VERY opposed to public school. My kids attended Catholic school for years. I was ready for any snarky comments my in laws might have, because we encountered our fair share of kids with behavior issues at Catholic school too. Fortunately, they said nothing. 

Fun fact:  My anti-vax MIL was the only person in the gym NOT wearing a mask (this was when covid was still a MAJOR concern) and it still irks me that I didn't tell her to go out to her car and get her mask, or send Reg. I assume that she forgot hers in her car. But alas, I kept my masked mouth shut, out of fear that I might join the 'troubled' teen and end up flipping a bird and getting verbal and having people think that 'troubled' was my kid and she'd learned her behavior from me. 

OK, *wipes sweat from brow just thinking about it* getting the post back on track:   right after Christmas, I emailed Michael and his dad links to watch Curly's dancing competition at Thanksgiving, thinking they'd enjoy it. 

His dad emailed me on my birthday to say how much they liked watching her dancing. He didn't realize it was my birthday but he gave me such a nice gift. He wrote (an excerpt):  

I wish to commend your family for the manor in which they exhibit their Christian values, which were acquired from their parents, to my son Michael. (he goes on to describe how he and his deceased wife wanted Michael not to be hidden in a corner and how he ended up becoming so social). Thank you once again for your family's friendship to Michael.

I was so touched by this. So nice of him to recognize my kids this way. It truly doesn't take much to be kind to Michael. He's easy to chat with and interested in everything we do. Still, it does warm my heart to see my kids make the effort with him, and it touches me that his dad appreciates that effort. 

It's the Grinch.

*****

In other 'nice news', when Curly couldn't have her friends over for her birthday right before Christmas because Mini tested positive that morning, her good friend dropped off the cake that she'd made to bring to the cancelled get together. 

Curly was super bummed about not hanging with her friends. I kid you not, she had
JUST said to me, but FRIEND WAS GOING TO MAKE ME A SPECIAL CAKE.
Minutes later:  MOMMY, SHE'S DROPPING OFF THE CAKE SHE MADE FOR ME.  

Sometimes it really is the little things. Am I right? Any little thing moments in your life recently? For your birthday?  

cue Huey Lewis: BACK IN TIME, back to my birthday

(Picking up where we left off on our quest to return stuff at the mall - next stop REI):  Coach and I wrapped up a backpack of Coach's for Christmas and gave it to Ed. Translation:  go pick out a backpack to use on your abroad adventure, on us.

He had a recommendation from Ryland's sister. I flagged down an employee at REI and he answered Ed's questions, and fit him with the desired bag. The line was crazy long, so I added the backpack to my online cart and away we went. Sort of . . . 

The REI employee was an older, very knowledgeable gentleman. Understatement. He was incredibly thorough. We had a hard time walking away despite our need to get to Reg's basketball game. This guy was a hoot, and we loved him. He closed his eyes when he spoke, took long pauses, and offered to answer any questions from Ed's oversized fan club/shopping buddies. At one point, he conducted a practice round of what a hostel employee might ask Ed at check in. "Do you need to rent sheets? Do you need to rent a towel? Do you need to use laundry facilities? See, this is how they can charge you extra. I recommend the sleep sack. Most kids traveling abroad get one." * I added it to my cart. 

I wanted to take this guy home with us in case we had any other questions about life in general, because I'm pretty sure he'd be able to answer those too. When we finally walked to the car, Tank said:  THERE'S NO WAY THAT GUY WASN'T AN EAGLE SCOUT. 

We arrived at Reg's game a few minutes late,  (I drafted this earlier in the season, but other stuff kept cropping up in the busy times of chez shenanigan. . . so mind you, this is a LOOK BACK) which had Curly, Reg's biggest fan, in a small tizzy. Oh man, this game. We were down by over 10 points. 

Reg played games each day that week. The Thursday game, on my b-day, was the last one. We'd lost every game. A couple of teams dropped out due to covid, and on Wednesday we ended up playing a team that we had no business playing - out of our league. Against them, Reg tried a few shots and they just weren't landing. Every time he missed a shot, and by missed I mean that it looked good- not an air ball, the coach yanked him from the game. And we're talking like 4 missed shots, not 15. He made some hoops too. 

Not my birthday cake, but this was
 Reg's cake. Can't remember if I
 shared it. The girls decorated it. He
 had covid Jan 9th but we sang
 to him from across the room. 

Hold.ME.BACK. For real. I wanted to stomp up to that coach and holler in his face:  DON'T MESS WITH MY KID'S CONFIDENCE YOU DUMB ASS. PULL HIM EVERY TIME HE MISSES A SHOT THAT'S CLOSE BUT JUST DOESN'T FALL AND YOU'LL END UP WITH A KID WHO IS AFRAID TO SHOOT. 

Why are some people dumb? So frustrating. Remember too, Reggie is young to be playing varsity. He doesn't have the experience an older, more seasoned player has. 

Happily, a senior 'Duffy', who was out with a broken finger at the start of the season, gave Reg some good advice early on. During the game when Reg scored 22 points, Duffy approached him during a time out PRIOR to his huge scoring streak. 

Duffy:  IT'S OK THAT YOU MISS SOME SHOTS. JUST KEEP SHOOTING. YOUR SHOTS LOOK GOOD. 

How nice is that? Encouragement from an older teammate means so much. 

So . . . on my birthday we were down the entire game, by over 10 points. In the 4th quarter, we came alive. Duffy hit a 3. Reg hit a 3. Duffy hit another 3. 

All Reg's games had been early in the day in the tournie, till that last game, so Coach made dinner reservations without realizing that we'd have to leave Reg's game early. Coach gave me the 'let's go' sign and I insisted we stay a few minutes longer. When we finally left, I told Tank and Ed to text us. It was hard to leave an exciting game, but Tank delivered with his play by plays. 

My phone exploded. I was calling out who scored every few seconds. Right in the middle of these updates, Pat and each of his children texted me birthday wishes from Disney World. It was comical. I was trying to read the score from Tank and a message with a million cake and balloon emojis would pop up from Pat & his people. "Two minutes left, we're up by (insert birthday emojis here) - wait, balloons, ack, stop it . . . wait, another text from Tank. AHHH!  WE WON! WE WON!" 

So very happy to see Reg break out of his afraid-to-shoot mode and his teammates stepped up too. So exciting. 

This was my family dinner a few days after my
 birthday. Note, Reg and Tank are wearing matching
 fluffy pullovers. Tank was very excited about
 opening this on Christmas until Reg AND Coach
 opened the same thing. When they were marked
 down even more, I bought one for Lad. I know
 he had a navy one like this in college, but he
 doesn't anymore. Ed said he didn't need one.
This has replaced Reg's Cobra Kai
 sweatshirt as his new daily uniform. 

Dinner was nice, but I've told Coach that since the kids are no longer guaranteed to spill at least 2 drinks during a meal, and they don't spit food back on their plates anymore, and they manage not to need to use the bathroom as soon as our food arrives, I think they can be included in my eating-out-birthday dinners. What do ya know, we've gone and grown us kids who can be part of polite society? It took some convincing, but we ate dinner out Sunday night as a family to re-celebrate my birthday. 

It was a less pricey place, Chilis, but still tasty. 

After dinner, we watched some Jim Gaffigan, the comedian, with the kids. They were hollering at me because I was falling asleep on the couch. HEY, THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DRINK A GLASS OF WINE WITH DINNER, NOT LIKE I HAVEN'T WARNED YOU.

heaviness, fluff: a thank you that choked me up, a great team experience

So much heaviness. I have nothing eloquent to write about the horrors in the Ukraine. So unreal and sad. My heart also hurts for Violet's family. She passed away on Saturday. While she's no longer in pain, I cannot imagine how difficult losing her is for her family. Sadly, my 50 year old cousin in Texas is in hospice, her life has been incredibly difficult. My uncle, who also has cancer, is watching her die. He lost his wife a few years ago. Their son died at age 14. He has no other family besides my dad and us. 

I stared out the window at one point while waiting in the car for Mini during her interview and thought:  while I'm doing 'this exciting thing' other people are experiencing true struggles. The unfairness of it all feels impossible. I'm praying for those who are suffering. The rest of my post is lighthearted even though I'm feeling a tad low. 

                                                                **********

While it seems like Mini might get the scholarship (which is amazing), we've heard that Notre Dame might not be possible (not enough funds left at this point perhaps?) When asked, she told them that she feels strongly about her top choice (ND). The other 5 kids in her group all said, they weren't all that tied to one college over another. We're almost half way thru the 2 week waiting period till she finds out, and yet - IT'S ALL MANAGABLE AND GOOD. 

                                                                *********

I just started a load of laundry . . . I promise this post will get more interesting. It is not all sadness and laundry. 

Mini has a pile of laundry that has been outside of her room for so long that I no longer know if it is clean or dirty, so I decided to just wash it. I am CONFIDENT that it's clean. Once clothes have been kicked around and no longer folded though, they just look like they need to be washed. 

I, for one, am tired of my upstairs hallway, which is a very small space, resembling the floor at a department store at an after Christmas sale.

Mini finished up her basketball season Feb. 14th with a playoff game. The other team was winning by about 30 or 40 points, and yet they CONTINUED to use a full court press. What were they trying to prove? I felt this was bad sportsmanship. 

Back on February 4th when her team played their last home game, they honored the seniors. Each senior walked out with her parents and an underclassman read something prepared, like the senior's favorite memory, etc. 

It was a nice evening, but this was our first time with a female athlete at a presentation like this. So, we messed up . . . Mini  was probably the only one who didn't have flowers, balloons, etc. from her parents. Being Mini, she didn't really care, but of course she made some snarky comments to highlight our cluelessness. She joked with her teammates about us - thankfully/ obviously, we have thick skin. We are perfectly comfortable being the butt of the joke. 

When we lined up, I asked her if she wanted the three of us to Irish dance across the court when her name was called. Um, NO. Now, come on. That would've been hilarious, right? Coach and I holding hands with Mini, while she was in the middle. Technically Coach can't Irish dance, but he can fake it. I didn't actually expect that she'd be on board with that, but I love to test her. How daring are ya, sista?

Anyway, when we got to where the coach and assistant coach were, we shook hands with them, they handed me a flower, and we said thanks. That's when it happened. 

The assistant coach, a young woman who Mini REALLY likes, said to me:  

NO, THANK YOU, FOR GIVING BIRTH TO HER. 

Well, that just wasn't fair. How was I expected to stay composed after that? That this woman enjoyed Mini so much, that she thanked me for giving birth to her. I mean, I gathered that this woman was a fan of Mini's based on how they tended to sit next to one another when Mini was on the bench - Mini made her laugh a ton. But this - well, it hit me in the throat.  Right where that lump might form when one might be about to cry. Dang it. 

After we posed for photos, we sat in the stands and watched the girls do their warmups. They played a rap song that has Mini's full name in it. And I got all teared up watching them. (I know, I know, you all get teary-eyed when you hear rap music.) That's not how we roll (getting teary-eyed that is, we aren't opposed to warm ups, Coach is a PT after all, warm up you must) - we were doing just fine, keeping everything light and fluffy, LOOK AT MY PARENTS, THEY SUCK  - NO FLOWERS. (insert Mini's buddies cackling). And HEY, LET'S IRISH DANCE OUR WAY ACROSS THE GYM FLOOR FOR KICKS. (insert kid's eye roll here)

I goofed and didn't shorten the video - if you listen/watch to the first 11 seconds you'll hear it. Or, song is Bandit by Juice world (spelling). If you know, you know. Towards the end of the clip, Mini is messing with her hair. She'd thrown it up quickly at the start of warmups, since she'd forgotten a hair tie and ran over to a freshman player and asked her to give her the hair band from her own ponytail. And the girl obliged. I must assume my kid said please.

This group of girls:  literally a bunch of misfits. The team is very small (numbers wise). They're quirky and different as night and day from one another. Amazing academics vs doesn't really attend school regularly, germ-a-phob vs careless and sloppy, in with the cool kids vs not in with the cool kids, brown nose vs let's see how much trouble I can get into, etc.

They're so tight, so accepting of one another, and so funny that they just enjoyed the heck out of being on a team together. I mean, we won't mention there was a bit of a talent deficiency. 

They actually got in trouble on the bus to away games for laughing too much. The coach accused them of not being serious/ready for the game, because they joked around too much. Um, hey coach - that's not why they are losing, see the 'lack of talent' mention above. At the pasta party, Mini and company described some of the silliness that they get into/some of their favorite moments as a team. 

A senior on the boys' team was confused. He told them (looking around at his teammates who were all on their phones in the basement):  WAIT, WE DON'T DO ANYTHING THAT FUN. 

When Mini described this to me, it reminded me of a movie. Maybe I'm making it up:  a scene when a dad grabbed his son and tried to goof off with him in order to copy another dad/son combo who were messing around in their natural state, and the son looked at him like HUH?  NOT OUR STYLE. 

Anyway, Mini's basketball career is a wrap. It was a fun ride, full of memories. It provided her with friends who she otherwise would NEVER have known, not likely have crossed paths with/ hung out with.

Laundry issues aside, her assistant coach is grateful I gave birth to her. How amazing that other people see how great she is? 

Did I make up the movie scene? Or can you help me identify it?