July 1, 2018

where the sun don't shine

I have been hesitant to post anything about this topic.  Now that I have accumulated a couple of 'incidents', I think I will try to broach the subject - with caution.

Back in March just before I headed to Scotland for Irish Dancing World Championships, I noticed an itch.  This was no ordinary itch.  Unfortunately, I had experienced a similar issue several months earlier.

Back in November, I assumed it was a pesky yeast infection.  (yes, that kind of itch.  Now you know why I hesitated to share).  I tried the standard operating procedure for a yeast infection.  Much to my discomfort - IT DID NOT GO AWAY!

As much as I dreaded it, I decided to call my OBGYN.  I crossed my fingers that they would call in a prescription for an oral pill that would clear it up.  After I described how severe the symptoms were, the nurse said the 5 words that I hated to hear:  'You need to be seen.'  NO!!!!!!  Really?

To my horror (and apparently the horror of the Doc), she admitted that she had never seen anything like this before.  How is that possible?  She prescribed an oral steroid.  There was creme too.  It took time, but it went away.

I hoped the girls wouldn't
grab this thinking it was toothpaste.
 I mean we had some serious
moments of exhaustion after
 that endless journey.
Only to return again.  Yep, the following month it happened again.  I happened to be seeing the same doctor for my annual exam.  She was like, 'What is going on?'  I think it was closer to 5 or 6 weeks since the first episode.  Holy Hell.  I tried to explain it away like this had something to do with my age and my hormone levels.  It isn't really the kind of thing you ask your girlfriends.  'So, does your vi-jay-jay do this?'  I was given another oral steroid.

When this was all said and done, I called my pharmacist to find out how many times I had been put on the same oral steroid by my OBGYN.  I had lost track and I recall being shocked that it had occurred 3 times total.  Not counting Glasgow.

I began to itch before we left for the trip, but I was incredibly busy.  I thought I could handle it.  Perhaps there is some brain cell loss associated with taking so many rounds of oral steroids.  Or I blocked it.  At any rate, in my state of denial I tossed a little Vagisil in my bag and away we went.

As if the adventure of getting to Glasgow wasn't enough, my insane itching was the icing on the cake.  I packed skinny jeans for the staple of my wardrobe.  Enough said.  The Vagisil ointment offered some relief until around dinner.  Misery doesn't begin to cover it.

I needed the girls to know what I was going thru, so in a very memorable Mommy/daughters moment - I showed them.  They may be scarred for life.  I kid you not, I thought my upper legs would literally be scarred for life as the rash crept down my legs.  Had I worn my last bathing suit?


Suburban Correspondent said...

Are you sure it isn't a strep B infection? My friend had that (in the same area) and she almost went mad with the itching.

Beth (A Moms Life) said...

I hope they have finally figured out what the problem is because that sounds absolutely horrible!

Ernie said...

Yes, horrible! Times 10.

Ernie said...

At the time I wasn't sure of anything - like why I was being tortured so!

Kari said...

Holy balls this sounds horrible. I had chronic yeast infections when I was pregnant both times. Something about hormones and lots of shit going on down there. Just know, you aren't alone. Pass the Monistat.