when same-page thought goes thru the pauper-paper shredder

After my labs were normal, I suggested to Coach that we take the  gang to dinner. He said he'd been thinking the same thing. Hooray for the same page. 

I suggested Wild Fire. It's my favorite, specializing in steak. No menu needed, "I'll have fillet mignon, please." When Coach gets bread before dinner, they bring me, hands down, the best GF bread I've ever had. I never eat bread, so this is a treat. 

Coach and I usually go there for my birthday. His patients often gift him with a Lettuce Entertain You gift card after treatment ('Lettuce' owns several popular nice restaurants in our area), which is always much appreciated. We keep a little stash of our various gift cards, and we dig through when we want to go out. This is a nice occasional perk of his job. Remember - his hours suck, so tradeoff. 

Backup the bus to last year's birthday dinner:  My AHA moment:  Now that the kids are older and not spilling milk and throwing food, well - depending on the day, I'd enjoy having the entire family attend my birthday dinner. So last year we all went to our local Chilis a few days after Wild Fire. I figured that we'd plan things differently this year, so we could all celebrate me. 

Where the same-page goes into the shredder:  Coach snarled at the Wild Fire suggestion. Note - I had not requested we do dinner for my b-day. I just wanted to take our family out for a nice meal. We rarely all eat out:  schedules, kids away at school, and budget constraints. 

He said he and I could go to Wild Fire later for my birthday dinner, but it was too pricey to take everyone. 

I argued that we could swing Wild Fire once a year. More head rolling (his version of eye rolling, but the whole head rolls, sending a message of exasperation). Fine. I let it drop, but I said a group our size needed a reservation soon. It was Wednesday and we wanted to eat out on Saturday. I was bummed, but I said I didn't want to go to a place like Chilis. 

I heard him on the phone:  DO YOU TAKE RESERVATIONS? He sent a link to the menu at Outback Steakhouse, which I didn't notice for days. I wasn't thrilled. Yes, they serve steak, but still more of a Chili's feel than what I'd envisioned.

We wanted to eat early because we were getting up early to drive to Ed's college. We stopped at home after mass 4:30 mass VERY briefly - since we live a few houses away. Coach was annonyed because reservations were at 5:45. 

Outback was at the far end of the neighboring town. More of a 20 min drive than what I'd assumed was a 7 minute drive. 

While Coach parked, Mini and I crawled our way through a huge crowed to check in. 

"Oh, we don't take reservations, but we keep a list of requests. We'll let you know when your table is ready. It's about a 30 minute wait." 

Coach had failed to make the non-reservation thing clear. 

My brain:  30 min is a worse case scenario. We'll be seated sooner. 

We  waited like cattle (get it, steak place). When the bench opened up, I sat. I told my tall people to try to move away from the booths where people were eating. With limited standing room, my guys were spilling into the aisles. I tried to stay positive. Lad was meeting us straight from work, so this would mean he might make it in time. 

I bought this when we were in Annapolis watching Lad play water polo. I had it in my closet and intended to give it to him for graduation. Then 'shit-show', so I gave it to him for Christmas. (wording:  THERE HAS NEVER BEEN A DAY WHEN I HAVE NOT BEEN PROUD OF YOU, I SAID TO MY SON - THOUGH SOME DAYS I'M LOUDER ABOUT OTHER STUFF SO IT'S EASY TO MISS THAT.)

As I read several blog posts on my phone, the crowd thinned. Lad arrived. We waited. 

A man, tired of having my men cast a shadow over his meal, asked the hostess to make them move. I overheard him and instructed Mini to alert the fam, NOW. Sheesh. 

Eventually, I asked the hostess for an update. A large group was still using 'our' table. I'd seen these people leave and come back with store-bought cupcakes as if they had a private room. I watched as the group finished eating, and now stood around their table chatting - despite no space to do so. Really it couldn't be helped, but a different restaurant would've been more ideal for our purposes . . . as in - we wanted to sit down and eat without bumping elbows with other tables. We needed a real reservation. 

We waited for 1 hr., 10 minutes for our table. So much for eating early and getting to bed. *My gut issues sometimes ramp up when I eat late. 

The server:  ARE WE CELEBRATING ANYTHING?

Coach:  YEAH, IT'S HER BIRTHDAY.

Me:  OH, WOOPS. NOT MY BIRTHDAY. THIS ISN'T HOW I CHOOSE TO CELEBRATE. 

Other than that comment and the few tears I quietly shed at the hour-wait mark, I made a conscious effort to engage and chat with my people because this was our one-night-out meal. The dinner was fine. I didn't order a fillet, since Coach was so cost conscious. He'd chosen this place because he'd been given a $50 gift card. 

Gift cards from patients:  both a blessing and a curse. 

A waitress handed Mini her plate across three people. Mini reached for it, but the plate tilted and a puddle of grease landed in her lap all over her new purse and her favorite jeans. She wiped away tears while I assured her I'd probably be able to get the grease out. 

I was honestly grateful for the family time. Lad had threatened not to come after his outburst about not being included in the Ireland trip, but there he was. 

I get that it's pricey to treat the family. I know Coach was aligning with our commitment to being cautious with money, but the kids are all old enough to enjoy a night out and appreciate it. It isn't something we do often. Also, Mini has a scholarship and Ed has a great job lined up and he'll pay us back for this semester's tuition so we can pay it forward to another kid. The 'we're fine' list goes on. 

Next year it'll be done right. I promise to make the reservation myself. I work very, very hard (and I have an upcoming post about my daycare to prove it). I earn a good income and I save money where I can. Our kids are borrowing VERY little to pay for college. I've spent YEARS being frugal and careful with money. One nice dinner out a year does not frivolous spenders make. We are NOT paupers, damn it. 

I'm thinking of planning a festive Wild Fire half-birthday this summer when we are all together. Half birthdays are the same as birthday months in my book - celebrate till all celebration efforts have been exhausted. 

Oh, and when the bread basket, brimming with gluten, arrived at Outback, I was starving. Enough said? 

Tell me, do you choose where you and the family eat out? Will any of you be in town around, oh - say June 30th, and if so, would you like to gather for my 1/2 birthday? Do you have a suggestion for a place for us to eat in the Chicagoland area?