rendez vous, si vous plais

After our successful backyard, photo shoot I placed a desperate call to my folks to borrow my dad's car because the Kia died.  He never drives because he is stuck inside during the pandemic.  He has leukemia and he CANNOT catch this dang virus.  

All summer my friends have encouraged me to ask my folks if we could borrow dad's car.  Mom drives a jaguar and she usually drives him to his doctor appointments.  Any idea how helpful it would have been to have an extra car during this hectic summer?  Dad drives a Buick Rendez Vous - maybe from 2010 or before.  

Not like I was asking for the keys to the jag.

Coach didn't urge me to call, knowing my red-headed-step-child status in the fam.  He did suggest that if I did ask to borrow the car, that I promise that only Coach or I would drive it.  He figured that might make them relax a tad.  

My mom was kind of caught off guard when I called.  Lad was starting a job, ironically at a car dealership 45 minutes north of us, THE NEXT DAY.  Ed was still doing his internship at the other car dealership, also far away but not the same direction as Lad.  Coach needed to get to work, and I would need to drive people places.  

If you are old-enough not to have to e-learn right now, then you might be out of practice, but trust me - the math did not add up on this.  We were a couple cars short of being mobile and I was a few relaxing days shy of not losing my mind.  I'm not even sure I used that correctly, but I was in panic mode.

My mom sputtered a bit.  Dad was busy and she couldn't ask him, so she agreed.  Hesitatingly.  Really???

Ed dropped Mini and I off to get the car, then we ran to Walmart for her phone.  I saw school supplies:  "Grab a bunch of notebooks and stuff," I ordered her.  Always with the multi-tasking.

The next day, we learned that the Kia would be getting a new engine, but Ed would come home in yet another loaner car.  I honestly am not sure that is right - how did we get that loaner?  I sometimes feel like the detective in the Pink Panther movies.  (thanks GIPHY).  

Anyway, before Lad realized I was borrowing a car from my dad, he told his new job that his first day would have to be Tuesday.  

Now we were back to 3 cars:  red minivan with new brakes, the great white, and a loaner car PLUS MY DAD'S CAR . . . the Rendez Vous.  Four cars for 6 drivers:  bonus.  

I was ready to return Dad's car and Coach was like:  wait a minute.

He felt the Great White needed to be checked over.  Was it making a noise?  

Ah, she looks so perfect in the shade so we can't see her peeling paint.  We have to be careful not to park it behind Mary Ann's driveway (pictured on right) because she no like that.

Me:  (eye-roll) Yes, it makes lots of noises.  It's old.  Like me.  

We decided to drop the Great White off at the local shop to have it checked out.  This worked since Lad was home.  He followed me over there.  Now we were back to 3 cars, our usual low-functioning, high-stress, who's-on-first status.  

When I drove Curly to dancing that night, I called my mom.

Me:  The Kia needs a new engine, but it will be free.  Yippee.

Mom:  (disbelief re: the Kia, but quickly switching gears) Can Dad get his car back then?

Note:  I have only been in possession of dad's car for like 20 hours.  Not EVEN  a full day.  

Me:  Um, well - here's the thing.  Don over at the car place is looking over the Great White to be sure it's all systems go.  I will keep you posted.  Probably tomorrow.  

The next day, she called to ask about the return of Dad's car.  Again.  I wanted to call all of my friends and shout:  SEE?  I TOLD YOU.  

We only borrowed it for a few days, imagine if I had asked for it for the summer?  I guess like my grandpa used to say:  IT'S HELL TO GET OLD.

Fortunately, Don agreed.  The Great White is old, like me.  (He didn't draw the parallel).  If we expect to keep it long-term, we should plan to put lots of money in it.  I love GW, but it's not a long-term option.  

Closing a gas cap with electrical tape is all the rage,
here in Beverly Hill-Billy land. 
Sucks when the tape loses its stickiness.

We got GW back and I dropped Dad's car back at his home, and we all slept better that night.  

Then Ed went back to school, and the car juggling continued.  Lad drove our car to his job.  He was waiting to buy a used car until something acceptable turned up.  How dull would life be if there were available cars for more than half of our drivers?

As an aside, since we are sort of speaking french here with the Rendez Vous . . .  merde- that was my take-away from high school french class.  It translates to 'shit'.  I think I took 3 years.  I was awful.  Could not speak the language.  Did OK translating on paper.  

I attended an immersion weekend.  We weren't allowed to speak English.  My friends were going.  It was the only speechless weekend of my life.  I now know what it was like for my mom when she was considering being a nun (true story).  She had to be silent during set hours in the convent.  

I'm surprised Coach hasn't insisted on a similar 'only french spoken here' weekend at our home.  He's not a cultural guy, but the silence he might embrace.

Anyway, I FORGOT that the other people on the weekend could understand french.  Like, maybe they were there to practice being silent like me?  In the cafeteria, I turned to my friend, pointed at the food and said, "C'est merde."  Translation:  this is shit.  No, I am not sharing my high school transcripts.  

Anyone else suck at foreign language?  Have you said something that qualified as an 'oops'? Who's tired of talking about cars?