8 is Enough Adoption Day: Timing is everything and two things are true

While you read this, I'm prepping for the courthouse to make our 'Eight is Enough' status official. Drafting this on Saturday. 

Friday - yesterday, I had the day off. My ten hours of sleep were bought to me by Thursday's allergy shots, thank you very much. Turns out I needed that kind of sleep under my belt to stomach tricks from our friend, Kay. 

Coach and I used a gift card to grab food and drinks from a place in a cute town along the train line. Tank met us there. He arrived earlier than we expected and sort of crashed our date, but he's a great addition to any gathering, so it was great.  

On the way home, I pointed as we turned off of the expressway near our home by a Shell Station. 

Me:  hey, that's our kid. (I'd had one apparently strong Skinny Marg and felt tipsy, Coach was driving obvi). 

Coach:  Huh?

Me:  Yep, that's Kay.

The girls have therapy after school on Fridays and it's an amazing break for us. We can decompress and have a short date before they get home. Curly agreed to be home by 6:35 pm to feed them dinner. We got home around 7:15. 

Kay and Rae walked in. We were ready, planning to divide and conquer. I asked what Kay was doing at the gas station. "Just walking -wasn't at the gas station." Curly had sent them outside to get some exercise because she had to pack for a v-ball overnight, and couldn't watch them in the house. Kay was wearing crocs - not the usual if working out. I asked why, "I couldn't get my shoes untied."

Inventive? Me thinks not. *I told my dad today that while we all attend the block party she will be inside tying and untying her shoes 500 times. I feared with the amount of laughing that ensued that I might've killed him. Kay later admitted the shoe tie thing was a lie. Shock. 

Me to Rae, who I followed to their room:  Were you at the gas station too? 

Rae:  No, I tried to go into the church to sit in the chapel, but I guess it closes at 3. 

Me:  Did Kay have money with her? 

Rae:  Yea she did and I told her not to go to the gas station but she did anyway. 

I pounded thru the kitchen and into the yard where Coach was hitting a volleyball with Kay. He later said, I knew something was up when I saw your walk.

Me:  Give me the money. Claimed she didn't have any, over and over. (I keep their money in an envelope in my room because we've had issues with spending habits and sneaking off across busy roads to get to Starbucks) Rae told me you have it, so if you walked in the house and stuck it in the mudroom go get it. 

She got the $17 from her mudroom locker, and I asked her where she got it. She claims she kept money hidden when I took their money over a year ago. She said that at fam therapy the other day when I said I'd found $6 in her room. She kept $6 hidden all this time? Doubt it. Six was the change from a bigger bill she must've spent. 

I sent her to her room. Rae was up there. Kay hollered at Rae for telling us. 

Kay:  You used to keep my secrets

Rae:  Yeah, I don't do that anymore. I've grown and matured and you need to figure it out. This is a you problem, not a them problem. 

Kay:  They'll cancel the adoption. I only have three days to fix this. 

Rae:  No, they're not cancelling. Monday's just a day, and you've been part of this family for over two years. Like when you started writing Shenanigan on your papers at school. It's gonna take more than 3 days to fix this. You have to stop living in the past. You talk about the past like at least once a week. Those people weren't good for us. This is a family and you need to decide to be part of it and stop all this stuff you do.

Kay:  I don't wanna be adopted in a family with two people I don't like. (Curly was in her room and heard every word and she said 100% it's Curly and I that Kay 'doesn't like.')

Rae:  It's not that you don't like them, it's that you don't like it when they get mad at you, so stop doing dumb things. This is on you. 

Kay:  At fam therapy they compared me to you and you're just doing better because you're older. (they're only 17 mos apart). 

Rae:  No, I was the same as you when we got here. I was sneaking and lying and being bad, but I've grown up. You can do it too, but you're choosing not to. 

Coach and I stood in the front hall, chins on the floor. Blown away by Rae's advice. We could all hear every word - their door was open and they were loud. We were so impressed with Rae. I knew she got it, but the extent to which she gets it was really mind blowing. (Rae did mess up last week with the clothing thing, but it was clear then that she was really sorry). 

Rae came down to the kitchen and Curly popped downstairs, and beckoned to her. "Rae, come here." Curly took her up to her room, where she told her that she overheard everything and that she thought Rae did a great job and that she was really proud of her. 

Guess what? No amount of me and Coach saying good job to Rae could outweigh Curly saying it. And I didn't ask Curly to do that. It was pure and authentic and natural. We wonder if Kay hearing Rae tell her to get with the program might matter.

So two things are true:  The night sucked, but it was also amazing.  

Rest assured:  no one was actually decapitated in the drafting of this post. 

I was awake half the night, because I fear Kay has been opening various drawers in the kitchen and helping herself to caddies' cash. There's one drawer per kid just outside the mudroom, older kids' drawers have been reassigned as they move out. Caddies often drop their cash in their drawer. Game changer in the 11th hour. Stealing cash money? Walking to a gas station to buy yourself shit food? (The kids have cash boxes with keys in their bedrooms that they used when the girls first moved in and we can go back to that system, but the drop $ in drawer bit is convenient). 

Kay's spending the weekend in her room. Friday night most of us went and enjoyed an ice cream treat - Rae got to choose the place, Culvers. 

In our Culvers' booth, Rae told Curly:  I got my volleyball jersey today. I picked number 21.

 #21 is Reg and Curly's number. There's significance with our last name and some rapper that makes us laugh. 

Curly beamed at her:  Nice!

On the way home, Rae asked Tank:  Are you home just to caddy, or are you working on Monday? 

Tank:  I'm working Monday. Why is something happening Monday?

Did I tell Coach that I wanted to call the lawyer and cancel? You betcha. I'm drained. But we're soldiering on. I'll be on a call with the fam therapist, Katlyn, on Sunday while I'm on my way to pick up my funny kid from ND. Coach will be on the call on his way back from golfing with a few of the guys. Tank had a booze cruise in the city Sunday,. He has a friend who works on a boat (Came back to add this photo on Sunday). 

Who is old enough to remember the show Eight is Enough?