**I was gonna describe my after college/pre-kids jobs, but there are some interesting happenings in my daycare recently, so I'm gonna get to the point. Suffice it to say - EVERY SINGLE JOB I ever had prior to starting my daycare for teachers' kids was a NEWLY CREATED POSITION. Translation: fuzzy expectations and unsatisfying results**
I worked outside the home for a few years when Curly was preschool age.
1. I substitute taught. There was an app on my phone and on my desktop. It made a shrill sound that, if heard it now, would cause PTSD. I'd race off when I heard it, hoping it was a job that would work out. The kids were invested: Is that the jobulator? Mommy - did you get it, or did someone else get it?
2. I worked at a Catholic school 2o miles from home, doing marketing stuff: I ran a mom and tot group, organized open houses, mailed out postcards, started a newsletter to keep in touch with alums, and I ran a turkey shoot b-ball tournament for alums. After a few years, a new principal asked a teacher to manage the FB page. My position was eliminated. A woman I subbed with suggested care.com. I looked into it, and the first family I met (mom worked a teacher schedule) hired me to watch her kids at my house.
That first year I babysat (fall of 2015), I cared for that family with 2 boys, 2 or 3 days a week. The next year a guy Coach works with whose wife is a teacher, was looking for care for his one year old son. I added them, and the rest is history.
This year: 8 families - all with 1 kid.
Two that are expecting a second. (yowza).
** editing to add another family showed up today and announced they are ALSO having a baby . . . twins, due in early October. So, make that THREE THAT ARE EXPECTING, BUT A TOTAL OF FOUR INFANTS NEXT YEAR. (I will not be watching ALL of those infants, the plot thickens)
Not everyone comes on the same day. My brain in Sept? Frazzled, as I figure who's napping in which room and try to keep straight who is showing up on any given day. While I have babysat 5 days a week in the past, I put my foot down a few years ago and said ONLY MON-THURS, PLAN ACCORDINGLY, and none of my families who claimed they 'needed' Fridays quit. That was a solid step towards a happier me.
If you're good at math, try this: I have 3 families 2x a week, 2 families 4x a week, and 3 families 3x a week. That's a lot of kids per my 4 day work week. 
The gang on Wednesday
at a forest preserve.
Starting fresh: Most of my crew graduated to school in the fall. 2 families returned. I was scrounging.
Cece, whose kids I watched for 5 years but who are in school, highly recommended me on a few FB posts and warmed my heart ('My babies were so loved and well cared for. Ernie feels like family'). People sought me out left and right.
BUT: Two families, who locked in a spot with me in the spring, informed me mid summer that they'd changed plans. So frustrating. I don't require $$ to hold a spot. Maybe I should. There are people, maybe you're familiar, who don't process how their actions impact others.
It all worked out, but adding families is exhausting, because you never really know them till they're HERE in the flesh.
Not joking, early in the school year I would think - OK, DAY OVER, EVERYONE HAS BEEN PICKED UP . . . then I'd look down and notice a set of tiny shoes and one more diaper bag, and realize I still had someone sleeping upstairs.
*****
Have you ever had a newly created position? Has your position ever been eliminated? Ever worked somewhere and been replaced by the boss' daughter? (I have!)
Yay for the backstory! The great thing about daycare is that you will always have business. Big ups for cutting out Fridays, and yes you should charge $$ to hold a spot! When you are your own boss, it's your responsibility to treat your employee well.
ReplyDeleteMy current and previous positions were both newly created. In the previous I was bored and worked to expand what I was doing, and in the current one I am overwhelmed and working to narrow down the responsibilities. Hoo boy I have been in positions that were eliminated. There is a consistent pattern where the work load was increased, resources were cut, and management told me that there was an exciting opportunity for me ahead with details not specified. I fell for it the first time, and made sure that I got out of there on my own time frame the second time. I have yet to be replaced by a boss's daughter, but every day is a new day.
Birchie - Very true - I will always have business, but that comes with possible clients who are difficult or I might end up with a group that all wants the same days, like no one wants Monday randomly. It's often a puzzle. I enjoyed your 'treat your employee' point. I like that angle.
DeleteI've been both bored and underutilized in various positions early on in my 'career'. I've seen some things go down that really turned me off to the business world. I'm sorry your current position is not streamlined into something manageable. Decades ago when I recruited folks to sell life insurance for 100% commission (a tough sell for me, no pun intended), our office merged with another office. The director's daughter did what I did in that other office. She got the job and I was out. I had a mortgage to pay on my little 1 bedroom condo and my world was rocked, but I landed at ANOTHER newly created position. Quite the pattern. 'Every day is a new day' - bah ha ha. I hope you are able to take your current position in the direction that suits you.
If I remember correctly, there are very specific rules for how many infants and toddlers one can care for in their home, so at least you can use the law to explain to parents why you can't watch four newborns! Geesh that's a lot! I've been seriously praying about taking a day off each week but find it so hard to lose 1/5 of my salary when we will have three in college/med school next year and then four the year after. But money does not buy happiness and I would prefer happiness I think? How did you decide to cut back?
ReplyDeleteColleen - Yes there are rules, but my daycare is not a licensed daycare and all of my families know that going in. So, they can't use funds from work that are set aside for daycare expenses, etc. to pay me. I am not limited to a set number of kids because I'm not licensed, BUT no one (including me) wants to drop kids off at a daycare overrun by babies. I usually limit it to 2 infants per day. The family having twins kept their oldest home for her first year - I think they had family care for her/took paternity leave, etc. I will not mind if they opt to keep their twins home for 1 year. I've had infant twins before, and it's a lot.
DeleteI decided to cut back because I had a few days a week with very few kids and I decided to condense. My other days are pretty packed with littles, but I'm of the mind the more the merrier. They really do have fun when their friends are here. The extra day off is life giving - not gonna lie. I need that time in order to function and not be grouchy, spread too thin the rest of the week. I would love for you to be able to work it out that you only work 4 days a week. Can you supplement your income with something else? Like the teaching online classes, or does that just add to your load?
Oh yes, I know those people (the ones who don't think their actions impact others.) I have people schedule a massage (this is my private business, I go to their house) and then cancel the day of. Wait! I set aside that time for them and was planning on that money. I don't charge a cancelation fee (it would be tricky in this situation) but I definitely think you should require a deposit to hold the spot.
ReplyDeleteTaking care of little kids is SO HARD. I'm glad you took Fridays off! It's your business, you can do what you want. If some families leave because of it, you'll get others who work with your schedule.
Jenny - I'm angry on your behalf. Last minute cancellations are so rude. They should still send you some monetary payment. Could you write it in somewhere, 'Last minute cancellations interfere with my schedule and those spots cannot be filled with other clients, so kindly consider paying in full or some portion of your appointment for my valuable time.' My guess is you don't want to alienate clients who could drop you, but maybe they just haven't thought of how thoughtless they are being.
DeleteI might hold a deposit moving forward, and credit them for that first week of care, etc. On Thursdays I'm like IT FEELS LIKE FRIDAY, BECAUSE IT IS FOR ME! My school age kids are sort of eye-rolly when I do that, but it's so true. On Thursdays I'm like I GET TO PUT THE HIGH CHAIRS AWAY AND THE TOYS CAN BE SHOVED OUT OF THE WAY, etc.
Once again, let me say how valuable trusted home daycare is. I relied so heavily upon it when I was teaching and my sons were little. Our provider lived six doors down from us and we are immensely grateful to this day for her and her entire family.
ReplyDeleteSam, my youngest, used to wake up even on the weekends when he was so little and ask, "I go Nanny house today?" He adored Joann and even rode his bike over there early (6:30 AM!) on summer mornings sometimes while I was still asleep and ate breakfast. When Sam got his first car, he went over and picked Joann up to give her a ride.
What you do provides a huge relief for working parents. Not just that, but it means so much to the kids. It's a Big Deal.
Nance - I don't think I knew that Joann lived 6 doors away from you. Can't beat that with a stick, esp because she was so great. I love that Sam rode his bike there on early summer mornings and took her for a ride in his first car. I reached out to my 5 year family that just moved on to school on Monday to check in. The mom texted me back and said WE WILL NEVER NOT MISS YOU. My heart. I've got a mom right now that's getting bent out of shape about little things and it is making my days a little hard, because her guy is here 4 days a week. He's been crying for under 1 minute when he gets dropped off. It's a phase - he just turned 2, pretty common. He's REALLY happy here the rest of the day. I love his so much and he is crazy about his friends. My guess: she is suffering mom guilt but she's got me on edge and I'm now anxiously waiting for the summer.
DeleteThe rest of the parents are over the moon grateful and appreciative and not shy about telling me that. One mom is so chill I can tell her funny things like Couldn't figure out why the baby wasn't drinking her bottle (she's 1 and holds it on her own usually), then I decided to feed it to her and I realized the stopper was still in it, so it didn't spill in the diaper bag. (she'd just switched to milk, so I didn't have to open the bottle and mix in the formula and I blanked on the stopper). We chuckled about it but that other mom - had I shared something like that? She prob would've frowned and said Oh, I bet he was so hungry. Ugh.
The kids are always so excited to see one another and me, and Reg, and Curly. I'd say going on outings in the big white van really gives me an edge that not all caregivers can do - we love visiting fun parks, and the zoo, etc.
This will sound weird to you, but I hated watching any kids who weren’t my own. Like, truly dreaded and hated it, even though I did it as a favor a few times for friends. Major kudos to you!
ReplyDeleteI only ever had 4 different jobs and 3 employers. All 3 of those places went out of business within 10 years after I left.
Bijoux - This does NOT sound weird to me. I've been at the park, at our pool, I've subbed in classrooms and I often walked away thinking THANK HEAVENS FOR MY KIDS, BECAUSE OTHER KIDS SUCK. But, I've typically loved the kids I babysat for (started babysitting when I was 12) and it never dawned on me that I wouldn't like a tiny child/infant. So, here we are. I really have enjoyed most of the kids that have been in my care over the last 10 years. Sometimes the parents are difficult though - which for some reason is worse. I can distract kids. I can be silly with them, read them books, tell them to go enjoy some quiet play, but horrible parents? No thanks. Funny how my dislike for other kids didn't crop up when we considered adopting a couple of older kids. I guess in my heart I knew they needed a family and I believed that once they were here long enough, we could mold them into people who were not irritating. Jury is still out there. Kidding, sort of?
DeleteAfter you left they went out of business? Hmm, sounds like they should've held onto you longer. ;) Sounds like you had a good run though - like must've been good jobs/nice people if you stayed as long as you did, which is great.
Families absolutely should have to place a deposit to reserve a spot! Then they are maybe less likely to flake and if they do, at least there is a bit of monetary reward for you? But come on people! Don't be willy nilly about childcare decisions.
ReplyDeleteWe've always used a daycare center because I don't know of any home daycares in our area. If I had a first person recommendation, I would be more apt to use a home daycare, but I think home daycares would not love our hours (we drop off at 7am). I loved the Spanish Immersions daycare our kids went to up until 2 summers ago when we left because the owner was treating staff terribly. That aligned with Paul going to the public school summer program. Will goes to a new place now which I would say is "fine" overall - they have a sandbox, though, which we LOATHE. Will recently changed classrooms and has 2 male teachers which he is very excited about as he's never had male daycare providers.
I've only left roles by choice but I had a basically forced relocation to Charlotte - had I note taken it I would have been let go. After that I was like - never again! So I saved like a madwoman so I'd never be in the position where I'd be forced to move. And now that I'm married I have a big safety net in Phil since he has a solid income, too.
Lisa - I think you're right. It's such an awkward thing, but since I've been burned before I plan to require that moving forward. Fingers crossed, I won't even need to recruit new families for a while since these families are GROWING.
DeleteI start at 7:30 am, but I know there are in home places around here that start earlier. I had no experience of in home daycare as I always stayed home with our kids, but I do really think the kids benefit from the literal home atmosphere. There are a decent mix of ages depending on the day, and they all learn to get along and to share. Since most people are part time, they get excited when their friends show up. It's like a constant play date. I think the fact that we have adventures to the library, parks, forest preserve with the dedicated nature center that offers aquariums and hands on exhibits, and the zoo, my home set up offers something outside of the 4 walls of my home and that's the bomb. Fingers crossed that GW will not die on us before I'm ready to retire. OMG - we go to a park that has sand and the kids I sit for know - ABSOLUTELY NOT. I am not a lover of sandboxes. Male caregivers sounds really fun for Will. The boys here get super excited when Reg or Tank are here to mess around with them and chase them with monster voices.
I didn't know you once lived in NC. Being transferred sounds stressful. My dad was transferred several times when we were kids and we moved to a few different Midwest towns. I feel like that's less common now, because people can telecommute, etc. Coach occasionally jokes/doesn't joke about moving out of state for a PT position that sounds irresistable. A few years ago , he heard of a position in Hawaii. I was like HMMM.
It's fun to read the backstory of how you got started in your babysitting business. You offer a great service and I'm sure your clients really appreciate you! It must take a HUGE amount of organization to do what you do! I'm panicking just thinking about it! But sending you my admiration and applause!
ReplyDeleteMichelle - I'm glad you enjoyed the backstory. Fun fact: when I told the kids I was gonna start sitting, Mini (who was 10) said, MOMMY, THAT MEANS YOU CAN'T SAY BAD WORDS ANYMORE. Ha. She wasn't wrong. (or I just say them in the evening/early morning hours and on weekends - to my heart's delight). I def have a system. I have spare clothes and loads of old towels I use for diaper changing, and the toys are all in set places and I cannot live without my four folding high chairs and stackable junior chairs. Where would I be without my dining room where everything baby-ish gets dumped on the weekend. Thank you.
DeleteI worked for a start-up (that failed) so everything was new and stressful, but I was young 20's, so it was the right time to try it. I have been replaced by the Boss' daughter. It was inevitable. Everyone else in the office was his relative, and it was just a matter of time until the remaining daughter needed a job.
ReplyDeleteWhen my kids were in an in-home daycare, I had to pay for their spots even if they weren't there. Like in the summer, if the kids went to my Mom's for a month, I still had to pay for their spots, or they'd be given away.
Kara - I agree - working for a startup in your 20s in the time to do that. The boss' daughter. Ugh. Been there. My ordeal was the result of a merger. The woman who was the head of the other branch that merged with us brought her daughter over and she'd been doing my position at her mom's branch, so boom. That was that.
DeleteI follow a school schedule, so I only charge people for the school year and not for spring break, winter break, MLK day, etc. I also give them each two weeks of discretionary days/sick days. If someone uses me 3 days a week, then they get 6 days total to not come here due to illness or travel or a visiting grandma, etc. After they use those up, they pay me regardless of whether they use me or not. Few families end up having to pay for unused days. I do have a family right now that I'm pretty sure has used up their 6 days, but these kids had a baby at like age 20 (he's now 3.5) and they're not financially in the position to toss money to the wind so I probably won't enforce that. They don't abuse it, like he's been sick a handful of times. It's fine.
Home daycare is a lot of work. I babysat for kids when the girls were little, but it's nothing like what you do each day. I give you a lot of credit. It's hard work!
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I think I know that forest preserve...I've been there. Is it the one with the waterfalls? We went down there years ago. So beautiful.
Kari - It is hard work, but at the same time I can do this in my sleep. Sometimes I go to change a diaper and I realize this is a diaper I JUST changed, like wrong butt . . . so maybe sometimes I AM practically sleeping. ;)
DeleteIt is not Waterfall Glen, if that's the one you are thinking of. That was at Little Red School House. It has a dedicated little nature center. We love it there and it isn't too far.
Your families are really lucky to have you! When I went back to work for 11 months when our oldest was 3 months old we were so lucky she was able to be watched by a lady at our church who just had her basically be kiddo #5 in the family. She loved having four big kids (ages 3-8) around and our sitter loved having some baby time. Five years and having been a stay at home mom four years now later, I’m still grateful for her!
ReplyDeleteYou should definitely require a deposit!
joymarie - Thank you. I tend to agree. Sometimes I get a kid who doesn't know how to say please, or has some difficulty sharing and Coach always says - This kid needed you. Aw, that sounded like a sweet setup. Ours is definitely a family operation. My kids are older now, but dang - back in the day they'd literally race each other up the stairs to try to be the first one to get a baby out of their nap.
DeleteHave you ever had a newly created position? Yes, I was hired to manage a new gift store in town.
ReplyDeleteHas your position ever been eliminated? No, but I've walked away from jobs that didn't do me well thus eliminating them.
Ever worked somewhere and been replaced by the boss' daughter? No, and thinking on it I'm surprised that's never happened.
Ally - I'm laughing at you being surprised that you've never been replaced by the boss' daughter. You are smart to walk away from a job when you got a sense that it wasn't the right fit.
DeleteI was trying very hard to do your Daycare Math and my brain caught fire. GIRL---how in the world do you do it??
ReplyDeleteI don't think I've ever been replaced---I've quit a few jobs back in the day.
I think all the families that you care for, are so lucky to have you. Trusting someone to love and care for your kids is HUGE. (glad to know you've not completely forgotten a child upstairs.!! 😂 I would do that for sure!)
Suz - Your brain caught fire, bah ha ha. It starts with me scribbling on lots of scrap envelopes. (I open mail and then I save the envelopes to write my grocery list or to do list on). For most of the summer, I'll just down the days of the week and then list all the kids that are gonna show up on that day. Once the school year starts to unfold and I get into a swing of things, I still find my little notes where I was trying to map out how I could juggle this or that, or could I move that kid to a different day.
DeleteIt is great that they trust me. Their little guys are generally so happy here. I stick to a really tight schedule and they always know what comes next. God save us and keep us if we go on a field trip and we don't have time to play the card game Memory. One of these days they're gonna stage a coup and I'm done for. Holy hell do they love playing Memory.
This is the first year, but yep - I've sometimes paused and thought, Oh, hang on now. Someone is still upstairs. I like to play it cool though when the parent walks in - like Oh, hey - I knew you were about to walk in. All's good. ;)
I think if Reg took a video of my loading or unloading the gang from the car for one of our outings and I sped it up super fast and shared it here, it might be quite entertaining. :0
So interesting to read! I always wondered how you got started in the daycare business and makes total sense that it evolved out of a personal favor essentially. We have a neighbor that runs a home daycare but her pickup time is 4 pm, way too early for us, and she definitely doesn’t do cool field trips with the kids. She is lovely though and every once in a while if we are in a pinch with needing a day that our usual daycare center can’t accommodate, we will send the kids to her & I just sneak out of work early to pick up on time.
ReplyDelete4 babies would be a lot especially with the toddler/preschool age too! What is the most kids you have on any one day? I do feel like “kid math” applies to the over-2 crowd though where actually more of them can be easier - they follow each other’s lead and hopefully entertain each other. Except for the car loading and unloading. I absolutely would love to see a video of that!!
Kate - Too bad that neighbor's hours don't jive with your schedule. That's my pick up time, but I've had a family that needed me until 5 pm for 5 YEARS! They came 3x a week and didn't need until 5 every time, it depended on when the dad travelled with the Chicago professional sport team that he is an assistant coach for. (his team is kind of a big deal in these parts, and his season allows for summers off, so we made it work). I miss them terribly, but being back to a firm 5 pm pickup time is life giving. If someone has a meeting or a once in a while need to stay longer, I am flexible.
DeleteThere is no way I'm watching 4 babies. In a future post, I'll explain that I'm also sort of committed to watching another baby whose cousin comes here rn. This family is essentially family friends and I will move heaven and earth to accommodate that babe. So? It's gonna be interesting. I'm hoping the twin babies stay home for the first year. They told me they kept their 18 mo daughter home for her first year, so maybe?
The older crowd is so different than the littles. Last year I had one baby and the year before that - no babies, so I had a packed place - but they were older and could put on their shoes, dig out their lunch box, go to the bathroom without me, etc. Last year I think my busiest day was 7, but most were 3, 4, and 5! This year I have 7 one day a week, but I just bopped a kid over to another day per the parents'/grandparents' work schedule, so I think now I have 5 on Monday, and 6 every other day. It's a lot, because one little just turned 1 and I have 2 infants who are both 8.5 months, so no NEWBIE-BABIES. Still, a LOT. Car loading takes a while and you should see me carry everyone out to the swing set and rotate babies in the baby swing (I do two at a time, back to back in the swing - and one kid sits in the wagon and waits, or I bring a ride on car to the grass). Early June is not that far off. ;)
You should definitely charge a deposit! People are flaky, but if they have money on the line will be less so (or you will at least get a little bonus). My friend had a home daycare in her house in Iowa and it was a lot! I know that in the Bay Area it is very hard to get your kids into daycare/after school care and so they would definitely pay to hold a spot.
ReplyDeleteFour newborns is a lot of baby. I can't wait to hear what your story and plan are for this! I remember when my friend had her first kid and I was so awed by the fact that she would lug the baby to the grocery store and could still get anything done during the day! I can't imagine having four of them at the same time!
Kyria - I agree. The deposit would force people to make a decision. I definitely will not be watching 4 newborns. I already know that one mom is planning to stay home next school year because she hates her job and will have two little ones. I'm laughing at you being in awe of a mom taking her newborn to the grocery store. Ha.
DeleteThis is absolutely fascinating, because a) I could never ever ever do what you do, b) it all sounds very stressful (getting families, keeping families, having families flake out on you), and c) did I mention I could never do what you do? I have never had a position 'created' for me, but all of my career moves were initiated by me. I've left jobs that I should not have left, and have taken jobs that I should not have touched with a ten-foot pole. Employment histories are fascinating for some reason...
ReplyDelete