I've not been great at posting the joy I've found over here in 'babies-R-everywhere, basketball wrapped up, and the Christmas tree stand just got put away last week' land. I'm bound and determined to write a post about my FIGs. If you're unfamiliar with Elisabeth's wonderful FIG (finding joy in gratitude) movement, click here to check it out.
Week of Feb. 22-28th
Sunday: DELETED EMAILS
I deleted tens of thousands of emails. I only have 13k left. Um, this might make you cringe, but I was at 90k a few short months ago. A weight lifted.
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| I've worn this blouse before, but I think of it as 'dressy' and I'd not paired it with jeans. I wore this Friday night after sharing photo options with Mini and she voted this as #1. |
I pulled a selection of cute tops from my closet, trying to map out (in advance) what I'd pack for Mini's upcoming parents' weekend. This is twofold joyous:
- helpful to know what I was gonna pack in advance.
- Also, joy in not feeling like I needed to buy anything. I'm focusing on searching my own closet and shopping Mini's castoffs. I have options. Cute options, no less. I could, and maybe I will, draft an entire post about shopping Mini's castoffs.
Tuesday: NO GUTS NO GLORY
Curly's team lost. Her basketball season ended. This was sad, but her amazing high school basketball career has been a joy. Sitting in the stands, I reflected on how we struggled to win a game last year and how the varsity girls went forward and met with the AD, but only if the principal was present - in order to hold him accountable. They insisted on a legit coach this year, which meant they had to remove the guy who they'd stuck in the position. He was dreadful. It took two meetings, a promise to involve the media, and the guts (Curly!) to call the admin out when they contradicted themselves. They shook things up. The woman who coached this year was the assistant when Mini played, and she was the assistant for Curly's 1st and 2nd varsity years, one of which was her sophomore year when we took 4th in state. She agreed to be varsity coach, because she's wild about Curly. We so appreciate her as she was a gift to this team.
Wednesday: NAP
I stayed up late Tues night chatting with Ed. The fact that he came to Curly's game and then came home to stay with us was joyous. I loved our chat, but I woke up stupid-early and was bleary eye'd while babysitting. Joy: Ed watched two tots so I could nap while the 3 infants slept in the morning. A 25 minute nap is a game changer. Who knew?
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| What's this? Thinning out the bulk, creating shape, and giving her curls a chance. |
Our friends gifted us their really nice stationary bike a few years ago. When it's too cold to run, this is amazing. I'm grateful for indoor cardio. Also, Kay's haircut was causing some drama, but I leaned into the hair dresser and everyone is happy with the end result.
Friday: I'LL RUN IN THIS WEATHER
This day was nuts -scheduled down to the minute. I had to get both little girls to the dentist from their two different schools and then back again. Mini helped get Kay to the dentist, but the rest was on me. This was not joyful, but I learned to never schedule that way again. The weather was outstanding and I went for a run while they were getting their teeth cleaned.
Saturday: GOOD NEWS EMAIL
I'd reached out to a woman who homeschools a group of children - kids who've been displaced, suffered trauma, etc. She responded while we were at Mini's parent weekend, saying she thinks Kay might be a good fit for her school. We hope to meet with her this week to learn more. How much? Plus we'd have to hire someone to transport her, because it's not close to home.
bonus good things:
- The girls had a choir thing in the city, and moms offered to help out with transportation
- we couldn't be at the choir event, but Tank took the L there and attended it
- Lad babysat and Curly (had considered coming with us) was home to help
- despite a rough night in the hotel room: think heating like a sauna, needing to switch to AC and finally turning the whole thing off - I managed to sleep late enough to not have a zombie brain
I often pair a dressy top with jeans, so I think your outfit looks amazing. I do not have many clothes in my closet so I never really shop it, but I feel like I have all the major things covered with what is there. I do wear the same things very often though.
ReplyDeleteThose curls are amazing, but I guess quite hard to look after. It's good when you can get hair cut well. My daughter has very thick hair and so she always goes to the same hairdresser who knows how to cut her hair. Go you squeezing a run in while the girls were in the dentist. That is next level scheduling.
Melissa - I really liked the blouse with the jeans look. I'll have to do that more often. I have way too many clothes in my closet. I will eliminate something and then I'll look for it because it would work perfect for an outfit or something, and ugh - I hate that. Still, I think there are some things that need to go.
DeleteKay's hair is so pretty, but so thick and she wants to wear it long, but that gets unruly. She gets into trouble because she plays beauty shop when she should be doing other things, like reading or homework, so we were ready to find a haircut that would give her shape and less weighty bulk. Why not show it off vs always end up in a ponytail? The woman who cuts the girls' hair is like a 2 minute walk in the next neighborhood and she's fantastic. She charges $10/cut. What?!
It was gonna be warmer as the day progressed Friday, so I wanted to wait to run around lunch time and that's when their dentist appt was. It was the perfect amount of time and the weather was beautiful.
That top and jeans look great- glad Mini approved!
ReplyDeleteKae's hair - I hate teen hair drama. V Good that the end results pleased everyone. I need to drag my curly haired teen boy to a haircut. Why do the boys want too long, disheveled mops on their heads?
I'm trying to keep my home email under 75 messages, and work I try to keep to under 10. Not always successful, but I'm afraid if I sent up some auto-sort into folders I'd miss stuff.
And, as much as my teen self would hate me, I rarely rush to a mall to buy anything. Sad reflection on how this 80s girl has fallen.
mbmom11 - Thank you. I had to beg Mini not to share any of the photos I sent, because I was rushing and I put one jacket on with out a shirt on underneath - just to show her with the pants. Ha.
DeleteKay's hair has been nonstop drama since the day she moved in. I finally said You're getting it cut so that it can be easily styled.
I don't think she's wild about it, but it does show off her body and she feared she was gonna have short, boylength hair - even though I assured her that we weren't doing that.
I've done a lot of unsubscribing lately so I think that'll help with the email.
This 80s girl has fallen. Ha - so funny. I need to not knee-jerk run to the mall to fill a void that isn't there.
That's a lot of emails that you got rid of! Good for you. A few years ago I started unsubscribing every time I went to the bathroom at work. So, 5-7 x a day, a few each time, and finally I wasn't getting as many to begin with which is the major battle. Then I archived and categorized all old ones so I was at zero. Yay. Now I regularly have about 20-30 that I like to keep in the main inbox, since they are usually something I haven't closed out (a reservation for example) but otherwise I pretty much cull or archive everything else.
ReplyDeleteAt work I was usually between 0 and 20, but I had a severe 24 hour response rule also. As for closets, I shop my backpack. Haha. Actually I did help myself to my friend K 's pajama drawer last time I stayed with her. Why do someone's else's clothes always feel so special?
Kyria - I've been unsubscribing like a madwoman instead of just deleting and I'm hoping that will help. I did archive a bunch of emails - we're talking stuff from like 10 years or older that I stumbled on that I didn't even know I had anymore.
DeleteShopping your backpack. Eek I couldn't do that. Mini helps herself to my clothes all the time and now that she's at college, I'm like WHERE IS MY BLACK LOFT SHIRT and she says she doesn't have it. Hmm.
I am brutal about my emails and have lots of time, so they are always either at 0 or close to it. I am a big believer at folders, too, so anything I want to save, I put it in the SAVE folder. That gets purged about once a month. I have one email account that I use for nothing but junk--you know, when some place asks for an email--and that one can get pretty full pretty fast. I just clear that one out without even looking at them.
ReplyDeleteHAIRCUTS! Nothing provokes more angst in me than my hair. I am way past due for a haircut, and have already committed the mortal sin of cutting my own bangs several times. I don't think we ever get past Hair Angst, do we?
Nance - I'm trying to imagine 0 emails. My 13k feels like the new 0 in my world. My other big project is moving photos from my google photos to snapfish, and that's another time suck, but will be so great when I build a habit of doing it. Most of those pics are of my tiny charges, and when they graduated I like to make a photo book for them, so I need to keep the millions of photos.
DeleteHaving an email to give businesses so all the junk goes there is brilliant. I think schools should teach a class on these sorts of things, how to manage emails and text msgs and photos. ;)
Hair Angst - I hear you. Kay likes to wear her hair SO flat on the top of her head - it is severe. . . then the rest of it is big, so it's an inconsistent look. Curly chimed in the other day, and told her she wishes she'd listened to feedback about her curly hair when in middle school and I think that registered. Kay's hair is amazing. So curly and thick. This haircut gave her shape and eliminated so much of the weight.
I'm inspired by your inbox cleaning out--I have so many old emails, and it's not a strength of mine. It would feel so much more organized though. I hope the homeschool option works out well and is not too expensive.
ReplyDeleteSam - I'm so glad to hear that I'm not alone. I scanned those old emails and saved ones that I wanted, but I am sure there are some I missed. I guess it's a case of what you don't know you're missing - you don't know. The school option seems like just what we are looking for. We were mind blown at this amazing woman. We just need to figure out how to get her there and back.
DeleteI really like your blouse and jeans pairing. I delete all texts and emails asap. Like Nance, if it's something that I need (like concert tickets) it goes into a folder so I don't have to look at it in my inbox for months. Have I mentioned how much I love to throw stuff away? It's all connected.
ReplyDeletebijoux - Thank you. I really liked it too. I'd forgotten about that blouse, as I wore it for Christmas one year but not often afterwards - thinking it was for 'dressy' outfits only. I'm not well versed on the use of folders in my email. I should figure that out. I'm not team 'throw everything away' so that tracks.
DeleteI have to be at Net 0 for emails at work on a daily basis. Because otherwise it's completely overwhelming- I get 70-100 emails per day. I do archive most of them, for years, because I will need to reference them at times.
ReplyDeleteMy personal email is just a spam email flaming trashcan. Besides kids' schools, airplane reservations and hotels, there's no reason to use an email.
I don't like shopping for clothes. If I can't buy it at Costco or on Amazon, I'm not buying it.
Kara - I'm laughing at spam email flaming trashcan. You and I are at opposite ends of the clothes shopping spectrum - Costco might be the last place I look for clothing.
DeleteI feel like you're either in the delete everything category or 10k email category. I'm delete everything, Anna is 10k- that always makes me laugh. She obviously didn't inherit that from me. 🤣
ReplyDeleteKari - My mom has never had an email, but if she did it would've been at 0 most of the time, so maybe it is a gene/hereditary thing. Ha.
DeleteLove when shopping the closet works out, and seriously, the feel of a cleaned out inbox is so good.
ReplyDeleteSarah - Shopping the closet is something I need to do more of. I was a shopper for years. Would drop the girls at Irish dancing class and buzz over to Von Maur to pass the time till I had to come back and get them. Um, that made Irish dancing an even more pricey activity, you know? Anyway, I'm in a different place now and I don't bother unless I really need something. I have plenty of clothes in my closet. It does help that I did a big update last year before our Italy trip.
DeleteWhen my email creeps past 50, it's time to clean the inbox. Thousands? Never.
ReplyDeleteEngie - I don't know where I was when everyone else understood that emails could not just live in your inbox indefinitely. Thousands? Never. Tee hee hee.
Delete90,000?!?!?! Were they mostly junk?! I tend to do an unsubscribe purge every so often and that helps a lot.
ReplyDeleteThe homeschooling option sounds intriguing for Kay. Fingers crossed if it’s the right fit for her that you can make it work!
-Joymariecooks
Joymariecooks - They were mostly junk or old threads that created so many emails. When I went back to the very beginning, there were NO junk emails. That was years and years ago when email was simply communication between people. There were some gems back there that I archived, like some angry, bossy crap from my sister Ann, and some Irish dancing teacher emails that I wanna save to include in my ID tell all book one day. Dare to dream.
DeleteThe homeschooling option - we met her yesterday. She's a living saint. So impressive and inspiring. She only takes kids that have a trauma background or come from a crisis, etc. Small environment, individual attention, virtue focus. All great - only draw back, it's far away. We have a few ideas on how to make that part work.
Joymarie cooks - Yes, they were mostly junk. I have begun to unsubscribe the instant I get something I don't want, which has helped. When I went back really far, it was just emails - no junk. That was years and years ago when emails were simply for communication. I archived some of those - like the bossy demanding crap from my sister, Ann. And the nut job stuff from Irish dancing teachers, which I'll share in my Irish dancing tell all one day. Pipe dreams . . . they keep me plugging along. ;)
DeleteThe school thing is ideal. The woman is a living saint. She's inspirational and impressive. She only takes in kids who come from trauma background or a place of crisis and we think it is literally exactly what Kay needs. She is all about virtues, individual attention, working with kids where they are at. We need to sort out transportation and a few other details.
Triage email daily, unsubscribe as much as can. Look at total monthly and consider why anything needs to still be kept. then EMPTY THE TRASH. Do same with text messages. Do not keep long threads!!!! Best wishes. Your delete fingers will recover.....
ReplyDeleteAnonymous - I've been working hard to unsubscribe - that seems to be helping so much. Text messages - eek, not good at deleting those either. The girls were at a choir thing over the weekend and the carpool threads were insanity. I can go back and delete those now.
DeleteI can’t log in, even with my name and url. Weird, since I see other people are logged in fine. Sigh. Anyway, this is J from jellyjules.com
ReplyDelete90k emails…how many of those were unread? My unread emails got up to about 600 a few months ago, and that was bonkers. Almost all of them were junk. I looked at it every day to see if there was anything I needed to deal with, then just ignored the rest. I have folders, and I like to keep emails. I could probably get rid of a bunch of them, though. Occasionally my hoarding tendencies come in handy. (Not email, but you know, saving things…) Last year we were trying to remember the name of the great HVAC repair guy who fixed our A/C maybe 20 years ago. Couldn’t think of it for anything…found an old check register, and there it was. Still in business, still honest and (somewhat) affordable. I was pretty proud of myself!
Julie - I'm not sure why it is hard to log in to comment - you aren't the only one. I'm sorry - that's so annoying.
DeleteSo many were unread or junk. But it was hard to eliminate everything, because there were some emails in there that I wanted to keep. Such a time suck. I'm working to unsubscribe now. I did archive a ton of emails, but I stopped looking at most and just got rid of them. I love that you unearthed the name of the HVAC repair guy.
I can’t log in either - it says there’s an error enabling cookies, but I allowed cookies. Oh well! This works well enough. I keep my inbox fairly empty. I made a folder called “Mail to Save” where I keep the ones from friends and family. I should organize it better, as they’re all jumbled in there. But as long as they aren’t in my inbox, it’s fine. I also have a folder for receipts.
DeleteMichelle G.
Shopping in your own closet, or your daughters is always a great choice! I've unearthed some treasures in mine.
ReplyDeleteI love that you were able to get a 25 minute nap---sometimes that's all it takes to revive and restart.
Girl, that is way too many emails for me to even think about! I don't have a number cap, but it's way less than yours. (you prob. knew that!)
I love that you have so many good FIGS, even when stuff is crazy busy and not always joyous!!
Suz - Silly me, I bought Mini quite a few things that are the SAME as mine - - - if she liked something I owned, then I bought her the same thing when it got marked down LOW LOW LOW. So as those things surface, I'm like Oh, snap - already have that. Bah ha ha.
DeleteMy gut issue has resurfaced and what EVEN. So, I'm back to relying on naps and that's no bueno. But I am grateful when even 10 minutes gives me a reset.
Yes, I would've guessed that you and I were not twining in the email thing.
Hey, grateful moments are all around, some times of life require a little more digging to find them, right? ;)
I rarely have unread messages in my email box - both for personal and work. But there's a lot that I don't delete so I have a ridiculous # of emails in my inbox. But if they aren't unread, they don't bother me. I get 2nd hand stress when I see a person w/ an iPhone with a bunch of red dot notifcations! Ay yi yi!
ReplyDeleteI can usually make work close work for the rare social outing. I rarely buy something for an occasion because I HATE shopping!
Lisa - Rarely have unread messages . . . hmm, this does not surprise me. Where was I when the rest of the world became well versed on all thing IN BOX management - like how did everyone else know that the email was not unlimited memory. Gosh, I went back so far that there weren't even any spam or sales or stores or whatever - it was simply email. I'd forgotten. My email looked down right naked.
DeleteNo extra emails and you hate shopping? How can two people be so different? Hee hee.
That many emails would send me over the edge. I try to delete as soon as it’s dealt with or read but sometimes that’s tough….maybe you need to follow up on some? I am the queen of 20 minute “power naps”. They are the best and truly change your day. Love that you went for a run while the kids were having their teeth cleaned. Great use of time.
ReplyDeletePat - And yet, getting them down to 13k has me so relaxed. I like to be able to refer back and look at info, I guess. I took a 12 min power nap the other day and at first I wasn't sure I'd slept and then I could tell that my brain was less fuzzy. Yes the run was clutch - and the weather was so nice at that time of day. I would've preferred to be done with my shower before noon, but there I was - ready to run on a day that was warming up by the minute, refusing to waste time at the dentist. ;)
DeleteHow many emails will make me unravel? Gosh, it's probably a startling low number because I need a clean inbox or I will start having heart palpitations, lol. Even for my work email! If I can't see the end of the inbox, that's when I start getting panicky. (That's in Outlook; in Gmail, it's probably something like 10-15, HA.) I also try to unsubscribe to a few email lists every week. I don't know how I get added to these mailing lists, but it's annoying.
ReplyDeleteStephany - that's the real mystery . . . how do we get added to all those lists in the first place? I'm doing my best to unsubscribe and I can already see the difference. I'm def in the minority over here feeling chill with 13k emails in my in box.
DeleteWhat was your method for dealing with the emails? I'm at 9.1K and that number seems daunting to me. I need an intervention!
ReplyDeleteThese are great FIGs- a stationary bike (as a gift!) shopping your closet, and yes, I know from experience that a 25 minute nap can really fix everything.
Jenny - my method was - I stayed up stupid late a few nights and went back to the earliest email. I paged through and hit archive on the old emails from Irish dancing teachers who will rue the day they ever messed with me when I (ready for the pipe dream?) publish a tell-all about how horrible they are. How do they look at themselves in the mirror? Then after I tried of that, I stated just scrolling and deleting 500 -1000 at a time. I did it while we were 'watching' a movie - something that didn't require a lot of attention, ya know? I also chose names of places like Amazon and then deleted the 3k associated with Amazon.
DeleteI've meant to write a post about things that have been gifted to us . . . the bike is one of them. So amazing.