I have been taking notes mentally, which let's face it means I need to hurry and record my thoughts or I'll forget. These are things the kids and Coach have been saying lately. I don't think any of it will surprise you, but I think it'll give you a chuckle.
I feel like this might make a fun new 'what my people are saying' segment to my blog, and I thought it would be a fun way to celebrate my 1,000 post.
*******
Mini asked Coach a few nights before we left for Budapest what kind of dog he would like, since he basically doesn't like dogs, or pets of any kind.
Coach: UM, THE KIND THAT STAYS NEAR ME, LIKE LAYS AT MY FEET, BUT DOESN'T BOTHER ME. AFFECTIONATE BUT LETS ME PET IT AND THEN JUST LAYS THERE AND LEAVES ME ALONE. ACTS LIKE THEY ARE INTERESTED IN MY DAY AND THAT THEY MISSED ME. PLEASANT. NOT YAPPY.
Mini: OH, SO BASICALLY CURLY IN DOG FORM, BUT A CURLY VERSION THAT DOESN'T TALK.
*******
In early spring, Mini joined senior assassin. Seniors pay a small fee and then participate in a squirt gun competition. The last team standing wins free tickets to prom.
Mini and her partner were randomly assigned to knock off another twosome, one of which was her co-president to the Global Humanitarian Club. Mini convinced him that a local newspaper was going to write a small article about the club. She asked him to meet her at the library where the paper was going to take their photo.
If the seniors wore a cape or a cowboy hat, they were off-limits. This video shows Mini saying, "We should take off our hats for the photo." Her assassin partner's mom, who this kid didn't know, agreed to pose as the photographer. The mom ended up filming the assassination. Watch as Mini pretends to pull club flyers out of her bag to show the fake newspaper lady, but instead whips out her squirt gun.
I told her there was no way this was going to work, to not get her hopes up. Thirty minutes later, she came home and stood in my kitchen laughing uncontrollably.
Mini: I NEED AN EGO CHECK OR SOMETHING. I'M FEELING LIKE 007 OVER HERE. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS WORKED.
*******
While in Budapest, Ed described the gym where he works out. A HUGE guy acts as a trainer for people. Ed says he looks JUST LIKE the guy Ivan something or other in Rocky II, maybe. Anyway, Ed got to a leg-press piece of equipment. Ivan lookalike walked over with his client and asked Ed how much longer he had on the leg-press.
Ed: OH, I JUST GOT ON THIS MACHINE. I HAVEN'T STARTED.
Ed said there were a bunch of open leg-presses thingies. He personally didn't really care which one he used, but he could tell Ivan wanted this particular machine.
Ed: OH, I CAN JUST USE ANOTHER MACHINE. IT'S FINE. NO BIG DEAL.
Ivan then looked at him straight faced as Ed got up and moved to another machine. He nodded at Ed, then he said to Ed: YOU- THE KING OF THE JUNGLE. (not sure how great this quote is without the all-important Hungarian accent which Ed does an excellent imitation of). We were dying.
********
BREAKFAST OUT BEFORE MINI LEFT FOR COLLEGE:
Coach and I took Mini to breakfast in the hiccup of time after he and I drove Ed and Tank respectively, and before we drove her. We gave her a little speech about being careful. It feels different to send a girl to college. At least it feels different to me.
Me: Don't drink a drink after you've set it down. Don't drink a drink unless you remove the cap yourself. You have to be careful.
Mini: Well, I think I have tall girl privilege.
Coach: Wait what's that?
Mini: Well, I'm 6 feet tall. So, I think if anyone is going to target someone, then they will target someone, ya know, smaller than me.
Coach: (forehead wrinkled) Wait, what? Have there been studies on this?
Me: (looking at his face, aware that he is thinking this is a real thing) Oh my goodness, she is not referring to some actual thing here. She's THINKING that she should be fine because she is tall. Nothing scientific about it. (turning to my tall daughter) So . . . a guy who is drunk or stupid enough to take advantage of a girl is not necessarily going to be focused enough on her height, so please be careful and keep your wits about you.
Coach: Gosh, I thought that was the name of something.
Mini: (shrugging) Well, I am 6 feet tall.
**********
Whether you're fairly new here or you've been around for awhile, I appreciate connecting with you. Quite possibly more than you know.
I would SO welcome your comments on, well, I don't know . . . anything. Maybe tell me how you ended up reading my blog? Is there a particular post that has made you laugh/cringe/cry? Is there something that would make my blog better? Any guesses on what Lad was looking for on the roof in this photo, while Coach held the ladder, and Finn, Lad's loyal buddy looked?Well, now we have plenty to talk about. In case you are unaware, it is customary for every reader visiting a 1,000th post celebration to leave a comment. Brief is fine. Introduce yourself. I'm waiting.
54 comments:
Hi- your going-to-college talk looks a lot like mine! I give it to boys and girls though, but I also include never let yourself be in a room alone with someone you don't know well and if you feel uncomfortable with something, leave immediately. (I've seen too many stories of stupidity, malice, and false accusations.)
Congratulations on #1000! You make me laugh a lot, and crying- the adoption saga definitely, and some of Lads issues.(I have some sons who have some difficult times , so those hit hone.)
Have a lovely week!
I hope yourvkids continue to give you many funny stories to tell.
Happy 1000!!! Yay!
I am going to use King of the Jungle in every sentence possible from now on.
Also, I do think Mini is right about the tall girl advantage! But still, NEVER SET YOUR DRINK DOWN! Gosh, I don't remember having to do that back in the day. Maybe drugging drinks weren't a thing in the early 90s? I don't remember.
She really went all out on getting her target! That's awesome. My kids enjoyed Senior Assassin but definitely weren't creative. Sarah did drive over 40 minutes to someone's house and hide in their bushes but she was spotted. Oh well...
Did her team win prom tickets?
And Happy 1000th post! I feel like I've been here forever and thanks to my old lady memory have no idea how I got here!
Long time lurker... so appreciate your authenticity and humor. My kid is only in 4th grade, so you give me lots of insight about what's to come. Happy 1000th!
Congratulation on 1000 posts! What an accomplishment. I'm not sure how I found your blog but I've been reading for several years and always look forward to your posts. I think I'm drawn to it as the 'kid' stories bring back a lot of memories (some not so pleasant, such as the state they left their rooms in when they moved out!!! I remember spending days in there cleaning; the anger over that temporarily quashed the sadness over them being gone).
I loved your "customary to leave a comment..." - you have told us you live for comments. Happy to oblige!
Congrats on post 1000! I'm not sure how I landed on your blog but it certainly makes my Monday and Wednesday!
1000 post Par-tay!! I found your blog when I asked my blog readers for recommendations and Beth (Hi Beth!) said I should check out yours! So glad I'm a good listener :)
Hi, My name is Suzanne. Long time reader. Congrats on making it this far!! I believe champagne is customary for such an occasion as this.
😳
I am dying at Mini's Assassination. SHE IS SO FREAKING CLEVER. And tall. I love that she almost bamboozled her father into thinking there was such a thing as Don't Mess WIth THE Tall Girls!
The king of the Jungle. :) OMG! You can't make this stuff up.
I still will never get over the Tampon Post. Never.
I've been working on a What my coach says post for his upcoming birthday. He has so many unusual sayings that I need to write them down.
You just make me laugh that's why I read!!
Congratulations on 1000 post! Mimi was very clever in the video and I like the way she immediately apologized!
I've been a regular reader since this spring when Martin Family Moments mentioned your blog. There are so few blogs that post regularly anymore, so I eat up every post. You could improve by posting more often, haha!
I was so saddened by your Yellowstone saga. My whole family (8 siblings, spouses, and children -- so 26 of us) went in 2021 but we stayed outside the park on the Idaho side.
I found your blog from you commenting on June's blog - you mentioned something in a comment about a babysitting thing and I scooted over to read it. Not gonna lie, I can't remember which story it was about a family you were sitting for but I was on there side. Oh yeah, it was something about them paying you when they don't bring their kids. Anyway, you won me over and I am still here.
Congratulations on your 1,000th post. That's a big deal, blog posts just don't write themselves.
"I'M FEELING LIKE 007 OVER HERE." Hilarious. Oh to have that kind of self confidence. Although the tall girl thing was another good one. This girl is all that and a bag of chips, as they used to say. She'll do great in college.
I just love Coach's reaction to the tall-girl theory: cite your sources?! I don't remember where I came across your blog, probably from you commenting on someone else's...it's like a spider web that way, right? Congrats on 1,000!
Congratulations on 1000 posts! I enjoy the funny antics of your kids, as I look forward to my own children's antics as they grow up.
Congrats on post #1000! I think I found you through June Gardens. My son is a senior (Kill me now!) so I especially love the kids' antics. I can relate and learn some stuff too!
Congratulations on 1000! I'm pretty sure I found you through Swistle. I love the antics and hearing of how you deal with twice as many kids as I have with humor and grace.
I started reading your blog when you were sharing your journey to adoption from foster care. I am a relatively newly adoptive (from foster care) mom and was interested in connecting with other "trauma mama's". Obviously our adoption paths went in different ways... but I love your humor and have found that though we don't share the adoption experience we have SO many other things in common. I am the third daughter in my family of origin and do NOT fit in with the rest of the family. I have 6 children who are similar in age to your kids. My kids are all tall and skinny and most of them have curly hair (zero basketball talent though, we're all uncoordinated :)). My life is crazy and chaotic. I love to write (though I rarely have time anymore).
Anyway- I love your blog and love reading and laughing at your stories. Thank you for sharing and for bringing a humorous perspective to chaotic and crazy. I need that!
Whoa, another Kari has emerged. That's both cool and creepy. Or a glitch in the matrix.
Happy 1,000 to you! I'm not sure how many posts I've written, but this has inspired me to take a look!
I like how your husband described the dog he wants. Best of luck with it. 😂
Happy 1000th post! Looongtime lurker. Path that led me to you was probably some variation of Derfwad Manor > Jen on the Edge > The More, the Messier > Noodleroux
~annie
mbmom - I wish I'd gotten back to reply earlier, but I took the tots to the zoo today and Reg had friends over tonight, so it was a busy day.
We have had similar conversations with the boys. Dropping a girl off just felt different. Plus, the conversation with Mini was unique because of her 'tall girl' thing. I might have to add that part about not being in a room alone, etc.
I'm tickled that I make you laugh. Ah, the adoption saga. Well, that was brutal. I am pretty sure I have a few posts that I never even posted because my writing wasn't on pace with real life. The Lad struggles have become much less challenging. I shudder when I think back on all of that.
I have no doubt my kids will continue to keep things interesting. Thanks for being here.
Nicole - Thanks. I should have recorded Ed telling the story with his imitation of the guy's voice. It was so funny. Can you imagine, hard core muscle guy wanting your machine and then calling you king of the jungle when you gave it up? So funny.
I don't remember worrying about glancing away from my drink or anything like that. If it was a problem back then, I never knew about it.
It feels like it took forever to get to 1,000 and like it happened in the blink of an eye all at the same time. ;)
Beth - It was very inventive of her. She did NOT win the prom tickets. She failed to share that she and her partner were out and I was still looking for people lurking in the bushes, etc. I was like WHAT? WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN? Ha.
I wonder if I saw your comment on the More the Messier? Maybe? Then maybe I visited your blog from there. Or from somewhere.
Thanks for being here forever. ;)
Lindsay, or shall we say Lindsay the lurker? Funny. I'm so glad you said hello. I hope you will give a holler now and then. Ah, 4th grade. I remember those years, when they still let you act like you knew a thing or two. Or is that different now? Are they in charge already at that age? ;)
Authenticity AND humor, well that is some high praise in my book. I appreciate that very much. Thanks for chiming in!
Pat - Thanks for obliging. I do know that you enjoy the ways that kids keep me on my toes. Relatable from one busy mom to another.
Oh, the anger about the room. Tank wins the award for leaving his room in the biggest mess. Ed is in that room too, but all of Ed's things left behind were in neat piles, organized on shelves. Clear ownership. Tank - oh, that boy. He will be fined. I spent all day in there on Monday. Grrr.
Thanks for sticking around and for all of the encouragement. Knowing I entertain people who've been-there-done-that does feel like an accomplishment.
Amie - The fact that you know what days I post, well - I'm honored that you are paying attention. Thanks for saying hello. Glad that you are a regular.
Congrats on 1,000 posts!! I think you need a GF Nothing Bundt Cake to celebrate!!
I can’t imagine having 3 kids in college at once, is the house feeling quiet?
That assassin video was very clever! Nice job, Mini!
I’ve been reading more sporadically lately, but still loving every story! I’ve been praying for your mom’s health. Haven’t left a comment in a while but I would say I’m a long time reader! I think since around the time Lad went to college and before your comments were fixed so that my comments would post. Keep on writing!!
-AM in AZ :)
Colleen - Oh, I don't think I ever realized that. I will have to thank Beth for pointing you in my direction. Grateful to have crossed paths with you. You are one busy mama -hats off for taking the time to post and to comment.
It would be fun to make the 1,000 post an occasion for a real in person party. Sounds like the making of a funny movie - gathering all the bloggers who have never met face to face. ;)
Suz - Oh, bubbly sounds great, but technically I think I'd be drinking alone and I do believe that is frowned upon. *As I cleaned up the kitchen today before Reg had friends over, I picked up a Truly can or something from the minibar. The recycling in the kitchen was full. I normally put a little pile and then just bring a bunch of stuff out together. It was almost tot pick up time and I was like I NEED TO GET THS OUT OF HERE OR SOMEONE WILL THINK I WAS DAY DRINKING. Really, Lad probably drank it last night and then left it. I double as a bar maid in case you didn't know.
OMG - that video clip. It took me months to figure out how I was going to be able to share it - then I got it and it was sideways. I could NOT believe that her intricate plan worked. That poor boy. They had a day off of school and he was like I WOKE UP AND SHOWERED FOR THIS. His reaction is priceless. I also love when Mini throws the mom in charge of filming it under the bus. Epic.
Accommodating Ed being labeled as king of the jungle. Coach and I were in Budapest and we were dying laughing at the story. It's so dead on.
The tampon try was the single funniest thing ever.
I can't wait to read your Coach's quotes. I wonder how many will revolve around smoking meet. ;)
Jill - That means SO much to me. Thanks.
Jeanette - Thanks very much. Yep, instant guilt. They guy's reaction was priceless. He says to her YOU EARNED THAT. Bah - ha, ha.
Theresa C - Well, I'm so glad that you took Colleen's advice and came on over to visit my blog. I will have to thank her for that.
Oh, Yellowstone. We did have such a great tine there in 2010. It was beautiful and the kids had a blast. Maybe someday, but I can't even think about trying to go there again for a long time. I was getting hooked up with great early bird reservations with the pandemic cancellations. I don't see that happening. There are other places to visit. Then maybe we will be ready to try again. I sound deeply scarred, don't I? I'm not, honest. It is a vacation that requires a lot from me.
So glad that you got to enjoy it with your large family. I cannot imagine coordinating that many people.
Thanks for introducing yourself.
Anonymous - Commenting on June's blog feels so long ago. She was a super star blogger. I'm so honored that you found me there, that you followed me here, and that you've stuck with me.
I feel like all of the families I have currently are very grateful for my care. That's huge. Some can't afford to shower me with gifts, but they write really great notes and they often let me know how much they appreciate me. It makes all the difference. I've had some stinkers along the way. I'm hoping to retire with these families - avoiding looking for new families would take the edge off.
Thanks for sticking around and for saying hello. I love that you are here.
Ally - Thanks. I love your 'BLOG POSTS DON'T WRITE THEMSELVES' - so true. Although there are times, that some blog posts feel already written, when things feel like THIS MOMENT MUST BE RECORDED.
The kid who she targeted was so calm. He told her YOU EARNED THAT. I could not believe she pulled it off. She role played with me, or tried to for so long. I was like STOP THIS NONSENSE. IT'S NEVER GONNA WORK. Oh, me of little faith.
All that and a bag of chips. Yes, I think she will do great in college. She has been quite stressed and I'm ready for her to settle in so that I can settle in after I talk to her.
You must have a million blogs to read. I thank you for reading mine. I really appreciate it.
ccr - Coach was duped. For sure. Mini wasn't even trying to dupe him. She was just crafting a theory as it occurred to her. Good stuff.
Yes a spider web indeed. Thanks for being a part of my blog. Having readers really makes the experience.
Eli - Thank you - 1,000 feels both HOW DID THIS HAPPEN SO FAST and I'VE BEEN BLOGGING FOREVER.
While it was once nice to put them to bed and then relax, it is very fun to watch them become adults. Their personalities are fun and their antics, well - those can be fun or they can make me scratch my head.
Thanks for being here. I appreciate it. I hope your kids don't fake going on ski trips with a friend's family . . . when they really just go with their buddies. In other words, brace yourself. ;)
Cheryl - Thanks. Should I be worried that 1,000 is showing my age?
June's blog was a fabulous place to hangout. I'm grateful that you found me here. A son who is a senior. Well, that will be a busy year, I'm guessing. Be on the lookout for ski trips with a friend's family. It might not be legit. You've been warned.
Kara - Ah, Swistle. She is so much fun and so relatable. I think once you and your husband are outnumbered the playing field levels off, so it doesn't matter that I have 2x the kids. My grocery bills might be higher though. Humor and grace is a great compliment. My kids make fun of me a lot, so compliments are much appreciated in my compliment desert. (Coach does compliment me, so I got that going for me). Super glad that you found me and that you've stuck around for all of it.
Kari - Wow, I can't believe we have so much in common. From a numbers stand point - 6 kids. 3rd daughter. Tall kids with curly hair. Don't fit in with family of origin. You should move to my cul-de-sac so we could chat more often.
I'm laughing at the uncoordinated bit - my grammar school gym teacher used to say that I couldn't chew gum and walk at the same time.
I am super glad that I provide a humorous side to chaotic and crazy. I think we all need that. Thanks for saying hello and reminding me that you are reading along. Great to hear from you.
Kari - the original - 'A glitch in the matrix' , too funny.
Let's be clear - Coach does NOT want a dog. But if he did want a dog, which he does not. And neither do I. . . and look, we have a dog anyway. Whether we like it or not.
I wonder how many posts you've written too. Keep us posted. ;)
Annie - A long time lurker popping up to say hello, I love it. So glad to know you are out there, lurking and all. I love both More the Messier and Noodleroux, so I would guess it was one of those. So fun to trace things back, when we can remember. Thanks for saying hello. I hope to hear from you again soon, but if not I will assume you are out there, maybe? ;)
AM - Your comment almost got buried in all of my responses. I'm apologetic that I wasn't more available today to reply back to everyone. I guess that answers your DOES IT SEEM QUIET WITH 3 KIDS IN COLLEGE question. Not really. It feels less hectic. Less places to be and less car juggling. With an abundance of daycare kids here during the day and Reg and Curly STILL not in school due to construction, the house is not exactly quiet. Well, then there's Finn. Sheesh.
You have been around a long time. Lad went to college in 2016. Thank you for praying for my mom, that's very sweet of you. She's doing very well, and is about to be discharged from PT. I appreciate you being here, thanks!
I love your family's conversations! Congratulations on 1000 posts!
Congratulations! I found your blog through Martin Family Moments during you posting about the adoption saga. Your awesome writing has kept me coming back. I get excited when I realize it's a day you usually post
Cindy - Thanks. Ed's girlfriend came over for dinner over the summer. Afterwards I asked Ed if he'd warned her. Lots of talking at once at our dinner table. Her family is smaller. He said he had warned her and that she enjoyed it.
joymarie - Another note of thanks to Colleen. That was quite a saga and I have thought a few times that I should write a little summary of how things wrapped up, because I don't think everything was finalized here. Sigh. What a compliment . . . to think that you look forward to my posts. Much appreciated.
Congratulations! I found you following a comment you made on Swistle's blog. I stay because I have kids the same age (only four though) and live in the same area. Fun fact - I've read blogs for over a decade, but yours is the only one where I've left a comment more than once.
Thanks for all the great/hilarious/thoughtful posts - they brighten my day!
I tend to read blogs written by women who are just talking about their lives. I don't have much of a neighborhood in real life, so you're part of my mental neighborhood. For me, checking blogs is like taking a walk and seeing who's out at the same time and is feeling like a conversation.
Congratulations on 1000 posts Ernie. That’s a great achievement. I think I found your blog from your comments on another blog (Life of a Drs Wife maybe?). I just loved your humour then and I love it now. Your blog is absolutely my favourite and I love the way you respond and interact with your fans (sorry, followers!). You’ve built yourself a great community and I really hope someday we can meet up
Congrats on post 1000! That is quite a milestone. I tried blogging once, I don't think I made it to 10 posts.
I found your blog on the sidebar of Martin Family Moments. Cindy at Adventures with Beth also added you to her sidebar recently, so I never miss a post. Not that I need a reminder, reading your blog is one of the few joys of Monday mornings!
I'm guessing Lad was either looking for a frog that escaped out a 2nd floor window onto the 1st floor roof or someone was playing fetch with Finn and tossed a ball too high and it ended up on the roof/in the gutter.
Anonymous - I'm honored to be the recipient of your comments - over a decade. Wow. You live close, hmm. How close? 'Only 4' - well, I'm guessing you have a busy life yourself. Four is nothing to sneeze at.
I am touched that my posts brighten your day. Thanks for coming around to say hello. I appreciate that.
Anonymous - 'Mental neighborhood' - I love that. Well, if you've been around for long, you will note that my neighborhood is lacking people who we enjoy hanging out with. There are a few people who we really enjoy - I guess I'm talking more specifically to the people who get upset when Amazon delivers their packages at our house, etc. *sigh*
I'm super happy to be part of the people you read in order to see what's going on with them. I hope you will say hello again.
Charlie - I think I vaguely remember seeing my first comment from you. I was pulling into the parking lot at Von Maur, my favorite dept store. I was like WOW - SHE'S FROM ACROSS THE POND. It still tickles me that you found me all the way over here. I sure hope we will meet someday. Looking forward to it. I so appreciate your regular reading. You can be president of my fan club. wink, wink.
Jenny - Another thank you to Colleen Martin is owed. Tickled that Cindy has added me to her list as well. This post has been a huge ego boost. Not that I'm feeling 007-ish like Mini, but ego check for sure. ;)
I'm happy to know that I help you power through those Monday mornings.
You are the only one who did the homework. Ha. You are very close to guessing what Lad is doing on the roof. I'll try to remember to update soon. Feel free to remind me.
Thanks for being here and for all the kind words. I really appreciate it.
Post a Comment