when every minute counts in a race to serve pasta to a crowd, it helps not to suck

I promise the college application/acceptance details next week. There are layers. LAYERS. 

There was a 'thing' that happened last week . . . I ended up hosting the boys' team for a pasta party last Thursday AT.THE.LAST.MINUTE. *I'm hosting both the boy and girl teams this Thursday at my house. Another mom, who also has a girl and a boy on varsity has volunteered to host with me.

I got a group email Wednesday at 8:45 pm to the team. The family planning to host the pasta party had a family emergency. They were canceling. Oh. Shoot. They were hoping someone would be able to step in and handle it. I thought to myself, SELF, WHO WOULD BE THAT CRAZY? THAT'S TOMORROW NIGHT. 

Well, have we met? I don't babysit on Thursdays. So, I slept on it and in the morning I still hadn't convinced myself that it was crazy. I asked Reg what he thought. He said it would be nice if I did it, but it was OK if I didn't. Part of me felt like the family that cancelled would feel better if someone else took it over. 

I emailed in the group and said SEND YOUR BOYS TO THE SHENANIGANS AT 6:30 PM, WE WILL DO THE PASTA THING OVER HERE. Another mom who was apparently planning to bring dessert emailed me to say she could still do dessert. That helped. I do know how to cook for a crowd, so why not?

It was all hands on deck. Lad didn't work until noon. He offered to go to the grocery store. I made him a list and I bolted for Costco. I had ordered a new cash card, having never found my missing card. I asked Coach to leave me his. 

I had this set out before I went to Costco.

Coach had a late start that morning, so he cleared  countertops and washed them. I had just cleaned all of the bathrooms the day before. We were shaping up and

it was still morning. I left the dining room in its current 'catch all' condition, because I had enough seating in the kitchen and the boys weren't going to care if they noticed that the dining room table has a couple of shoe boxes waiting to be returned, etc. 

I was talking to Delilah on my phone while in Costco, shopping without the list I'd carefully made at home and promptly lost or dropped. I managed to remember EVERYTHING on the missing list. Who even am I? 

PLEE-SA DROP SOME-TING.

As I approached the checkout, I alerted Delilah that I was nervous. Coach's debit card still had a sticker on it. Did he just never remove the sticker after he activated it? I hadn't noticed the sticker until after he'd left for work. 

My total was $395 - not all for the pasta party, but my people needed a few things to munch on. The beep beep beep happened, alerting me to remove my card. I wiped sweat from my brow. "Oh, thank goodness, Delilah, it worked." Then the checker asked me to try my card again. It didn't work. Uh oh.

I was like, but it beeped. Well, I tried again and it beeped again-  but a message flashed across the screen that said CARD FAILED - or something similar. YIKES. 

A man in line behind me came forward to alert me that my card still had the sticker on it. "It's my husband's card, so no idea why he kept the sticker on it." I smiled at him, pretending that I wasn't about to scream or pass out or both. The checker voided my order, which made me want to cry. I had rivers of sweat running down my sides. She said they could re-ring me at the front of the store once I activated the card. 

I called the 1-800 number on the sticker. THAT CARD NUMBER IS NO LONGER AVAILABLE, or something similar that made me want to puke. I asked the guy at the front if I could write a check. Yes, so long as the name was the same name on my ID, or something. Well, I really don't have a fake ID or have secret accounts under an alias, so not worried about that. 

I rarely carry my checkbook, but I had just gone to the bank. I hoped it was in my bag in the car. As I abandoned my cart at the front of the store and darted  outside to look for it, I called Coach's work. The receptionist said she'd see if he was with a patient. 

Me:  I DON'T CARE WHO HE'S WITH. I NEED TO TALK TO HIM NOW. 

Me (when Coach got on the phone):  DID YOU GIVE ME A DEBIT CARD THAT ISN'T ACTIVATED?

Coach:  I DON'T KNOW. I MEAN, I'VE NEVER USED IT.

What on earth? See, like I said:  WE SUCK.

It's official, I really do have 5 sons. Fortunately, my checkbook was in my bag. I called Delilah back on the way home and asked her if she was on her way to Costco, which isn't far from her house. Could she bring me $395? I like to pull her leg. 

Before I even took the food out of my car, I started boiling water for pasta. The one part of my day that I didn't want to sacrifice was lunch plans with my friend. It happens so infrequently. 

Could've used more than 5 burners.

I cooked the pasta and the meat and mixed some of the ingredients in before I raced off for lunch. I considered leaving the prepped food on the counter while I was at the restaurant, but I really didn't want to be responsible for the entire team getting food poisoning. I covered the five 9 x 13 Pyrex containers with tin foil and shoved them in the fridge. 

When I sat down to lunch, I told my friend that I really hadn't just had a facial. My pores had just been subjected to extreme steam while cooking a mountain of pasta. I always forget to use the fan in the hood, because remember I didn't have the hood for three years. I eventually flipped it on. 

The boys enjoyed themselves, but they were a quiet group. I asked Reg to play some music. He said I wouldn't like his music. Not sure why? Bad language? So he invited Alexa to play smooth jazz. Well, this was interesting. 

The guys staggered in at different times. I forgot about the music, because another mom showed up who I'd never met and we were chatting. Suddenly I noticed a weird look between the boys who weren't there when Reg jokingly turned on smooth jazz. I announced that this was Reg's doing, NOT mine. I don't have to be the cool mom, but I draw the line. Then I asked for a show of hands of who liked 80s music. Most of the team raised their hands. Alexa switched gears. 

I had a zoom book club to attend, and I hopped on while the boys headed down to the basement to hang out and the other mom left. Mini had an away game. She'd given me the OK to skip her game in order to do the pasta dinner. Coach worked late and saw the 2nd half of her game. 

The girls. Loud and proud. They were
rolling around laughing half the time. 

I texted her to invite her team over for pasta after her game. Mini texted me that the entire girls' team was coming. I left book club early to re-heat pasta. No Alexa necessary. These girls were loud and hilarious. Curly has told me that she's bummed that Mini won't be at high school next year when she starts. Curly knows the girls on the team and she hung out in the kitchen and chuckled along with the girls. 

I get to do it all again next week (also known as tonight), but I will have a partner and hopefully a cleaned off dining room table (thanks to my awful stomach bug the dining room table did NOT get cleared - I have my work cut out for me today). I'm calling it Ground Hog Day. 

Anyone else who doesn't carry a debit card, or whose spouse doesn't? Ever try to check out of a store and realize you had no wallet? Have you hosted last minute? This time the girls and guys didn't interact, because they ate in shifts. Next week, they will be fed at the same time. Girls seated in the dining room. I think my partner is coming up with a girl vs boy game. Any suggestions? Aside from mini-hoops in the basement and name that smooth jazz tune.