Cue the Sound of Music song, perfect backdrop to: MINI'S ISSUES, part 1
Cue the song from the Sound of Music . . .
Oh, how do you solve a problem like Mini?
How do you hold a moonbeam in your hand?
When I'm with her I'm confused
Out of focus and bemused
And I never know exactly where I am
Unpredictable as weather
She's as flighty as a feather
She's a darling! She's a demon! She's a lamb!
So many layers to Mini, what's not to love? She's smart and funny and kind, but there are times . . .
In case you can't tell, that is a mountain of crap on Mini's bed.
1. The room. You've seen, so you know. We've taken the door off the hinges, refused to let her socialize until she handles it, and begged her to TAKE THE TIME to right the wrong here. Let's not forget - she has a roommate, who prefers a tidy living space. AND, those of us who live here (and her friends) have all lost clothing items and shoes to her great abyss. We fear for her future college roomie. I've gone so far to suggest that she might need to choose a college based on whether or not they offer singles.
It was beautiful long, but long isn't what is 'DONE' for homecoming. This is when we ran to get it altered. We had to meet during the school day and Becky had to come over to stay with my tots. Mini went to the wrong place first. She was barely speaking to me. It was NOT fun.
*editing to add: I spent 3 hours in there Sunday night with both girls organizing and eliminating. THREE. HOURS. Mini tried to get me to agree in advance that I wouldn't get grumpy and that we'd only work till 9 pm. I would not allow that envelope to be pushed, and I would agree to no such thing. Last week, I stuffed EVERYTHING on her bed so that I could vacuum. I cannot say for sure when the last time a vacuum made an appearance in there. I was like THAT'S IT. ENOUGH.
2. Pay attention. In the fall, Mini went shopping for a homecoming dress. She doesn't get dressed up often. Prefers the messy bun and clothes that she may have slept in the night before. Well, thanks to covid there was a low inventory problem for dresses. Big time. We didn't realize, and if you remember, our fall was a tad nutty. So, getting a dress fell off our radar.
It was so tight that when she first tried it on, we couldn't get it off. No joke, there were tears. She didn't want them to add fabric along the sides even though the seamstress thought it would be perfect because we'd taken stuff from the bottom. I honestly don't recall what they did. Maybe they let it out a tiny bit. Her friends had to help her get it off after the dance.
It's a long story, but Mini went shopping with a friend. With my credit card. She bought two dresses. One was way too revealing, not something she'd be allowed to leave the house wearing. I get it. Very few choices available. She didn't really WANT to wear this dress, but felt like she needed to grab something.
Eventually I bought a dress on FB marketplace from a friend of a friend. It was too tight across the back, but I told Mini we could have it altered. I had no idea that the alteration place was going to rob me blind, but it was the 11th hour and we were out of options. Mini was barely talking to me. I don't even remember why.
*If memory serves: I think she misinterpreted something I said, thinking I was implying that she was needing to follow the crowd - she's well known for NOT following the crowd. That wasn't what I meant. I was just saying WHO CARES IF IT ISN'T A TYPICAL HOCO DRESS, BE OPEN TO OTHER OPTIONS.*
It wasn't like I controlled the lack of inventory. I was TRYING my darndest to help her find a dress. She didn't want to wear the leaves-nothing-to-the-imagination dress. The other dress that she bought was approved to wear, but she felt it was too simple. No pizzazz. She finally agreed to the FB dress.
It looked great, but I don't have a photo of the back of the dress, or a photo of her alone.
At the end of this debacle, she forgot to return the TWO OTHER DRESSES. Thanks to the store's return policy and Mini's OOPS, I FORGOT nonsense, we now own those dresses - plus the 'cheap' FB deal that ended up costing me an arm and a leg. It was a frustrating situation, but since life was steeped in frustration at that time, I chose not to dwell on it. I felt bad for Mini. She hadn't been to a dance in forever and this was her senior homecoming. She was excited to dress shop and then it was a bust. The HOURS I spent trolling the internet and calling stores to see if they had ANYTHING . . . well, let's just not go there.
The 'pay attention' issue: return the dang dresses on time.
3. Not the same. I let Mini borrow my piece of luggage with wheels when she flew to look at a college with a friend. The pop up handle now prefers not to pop up. The wheels also essentially refuse to rotate. Coming soon to an airport near you: an idiot wrestling with a bag. Blowing my cover here, but it'll be me.
4. "I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT WENT." I read a book over the summer called Catch and Kill. I really didn't like it. I wish I hadn't bothered to finish it, but once I did it was overdue. The high school is across the street from the library. I asked Mini to return the book for me on her way to or from school since I was babysitting and had no plans to leave the house that day. The book NEVER made it to the library and she has no idea where it went. The library wants $17 for the book. Mini is like, can't they just waive it? Um, no. They can't. What on earth? Who even is she?
There was another 'pay the fee' incident when I wanted her to take something of mine that she borrowed to the dry cleaner on her dime. She fought me on it. I finally asked her if she knew how much it was to dry clean a pair of pants.
Me: Think about it, if that was the case, then why wouldn't people just buy new pants?
I blame myself here a bit. I don't really wear dry clean type clothes - hello, baby spit up flows fairly freely in my line o' work. So, I guess that's partly why she didn't know this. That's also why I wanted her to go to the dry cleaners. It's time to figure these things out.
Riddle me this . . . how is she going to go to college? Maybe you shouldn't answer that until after you read tomorrow's post (or one day soon, depending on how busy tomorrow is). Believe it or not, a few of the most shocking issues are yet to be described.
Did you or your offspring or a teen you know have trouble being responsible, yet still manage to lead a productive life? I'm looking for a ray of hope here.