signs you've outgrown a bunk bed and a sneak visit

Well, finally a funny bit. Not gut splitting, just comical:

I reached out to the boys worker, Jo ( I may have named her something else, but I'm being lazy and I'm not looking back). It was early May. We hadn't been able to visit for several weeks, maybe over a month. We did a zoom visit with them in there, but Debbie let them take her phone and they bounced around with it like they were in a bounce house. I said I wouldn't do that again. Is zoom sickness a thing?

I asked Jo if the boys could visit? I can't remember the details, but I suggested I pick them up/meet half way on a Wednesday and return them on a Friday or Saturday. Coach was heading out of town for the weekend to teach, so we thought they could come midweek and tour the school. 

Jo said no, they couldn't afford to miss school. They could come for the weekend, but I reminded her without Coach there it wouldn't work. 

NOTE:  SHE SAID THEY COULD COME, JUST NOT MID WEEK.

I reached out to Debbie, the foster mom, and said, no go. Debbie thought it was dumb. They could miss school. It was the end of their school year (they finish like mid May - what?), so there wasn't much teaching going on. She and I decided we'd work something out the following weekend. 

Tank was graduating, but we decided to make it work. Coach picked them up and for the 2nd time ever they stayed at our home. 

The night before they arrived, Reg went to bed. Ten minutes later he peeked around the corner, apparently in  his underwear. UM, MOMMY, I NEED YOUR HELP. 

Working off a little energy in
 the yard after the long drive.
How nice that this photo 
was naturally blurry. 

He'd climbed into the top bunk as usual, and the bed collapsed - into the lower bed. This was the bed that we were going to have the little boys sleep in THE NEXT NIGHT. 

Me:  HUH?   *&^%#@!**^#@#

One boy would have to sleep on a mattress on the floor and the other in the lower bunk until Coach could secure it for their second night. 

The visit went fairly well. I asked them if they wanted a haircut so they could look like Reg. They were all about it. Looking back, I probably shouldn't have cut it SO short. I motioned for my kids to be approving and they gushed about the boys' new look, then they pulled me aside and said WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? In a word, it was extreme. 

Visit to the zoo.
Pre-scalping haircut.

We left them home with Reg, who was studying for finals, when we went to Tank's grad ceremony. We didn't have tickets for everyone anyway. They weren't well behaved for Reg - claimed the movie we'd put on didn't work and begged him to play Nerf guns. We weren't pleased with them. 

During this visit they asked us if they could start to call us mom and dad. We said yes. We soon regretted it - kidding, sort of. Holy HOW MANY TIMES CAN I SAY MOMMY OR DADDY Batman? They were excited and we took that as a good sign, even as we took turns leaving the room in order to faux bang our heads on the wall. *note:  They called Debbie Mom or Mimi, so this throwing the mom word around was more like calling a female at their school 'teacher' - there wasn't a lot connected to it. Yet, but we had hope. 

The next weekend was Memorial Weekend. We invited them back. They were super excited. An hour before I was planning to leave to pick them up, Coach and I had a zoom meeting with the team. 

Jo:  OH, BY THE WAY. I SAW THE BOYS AND THEY SAID THAT YOU CUT THEIR HAIR IN CHICAGO, ERNIE. 

Me:  YEP, I DID. WHEN THEY VISITED LAST WEEKEND.

Jo:  I DIDN'T BELIEVE THEM, BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THAT VISIT AND YOU CAN'T PLAN VISITS WITHOUT ME. 

Me:  OH, SORRY. I THOUGHT SINCE YOU SAID THEY COULD VISIT THE WEEKEND BEFORE THAT WE WERE ALL GOOD. I THOUGHT THE ICPC WAS ALL DONE.

Mini and the boys, that 3rd
 kid isn't one of ours,
although the numbers are
 getting mighty high
over here and sometimes
it's hard to tell. 

Debbie:  YEAH, SORRY. MY FAULT. I THOUGHT THEY COULD JUST VISIT THERE NOW.

Jo:  EVEN THOUGH THE ICPC IS FILLED OUT, THEY CAN'T COME FOR VISITS WITHOUT A COURT ORDER *here's where we pause and notice that the weekend before she was going to let them visit without a court order, confused much?*

Me:  Well, I'm leaving in less than an hour to come and pick them up for another visit this weekend. Do you have time for a court order?

Jo:  Oh, let me find out. (pause for a moment) No, they can't visit even with a court order. They can't come this weekend. *So the time when she was going to let them visit but Coach was going out of town would've been a no-no, so she clearly didn't understand the rules either.

Jo agreed to go see the boys and explain the mix up herself because we all knew they'd be disappointed. 

We continued to pester for info on when we could move them here. We wanted time to get them adjusted over the summer when I wasn't babysitting and before school started. Sometimes things make too much sense. 

Debbie called me one day and told me that she was instructed to find childcare for the summer. I was like WHAT?! Why couldn't they just come here? Debbie is great but she was working and was solo and wasn't having them practice reading or writing. They did more screen time then they would've done here. Meanwhile I had a tutor lined up for them. Two times a week. Basketball camp. A local pool membership- the real deal, not even the racoon spa. This was so frustrating. 

More tomorrow, unless someone says - STOP, I CAN'T READ THIS ANYMORE. IT'S TOO MIND BLOWING.