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September 7, 2021

HOME ALONE: only in my dreams

 I came downstairs bleary eyed (after sleeping till an almost unprecedented 7 am). 

 When Curly needed colored
pencils for school and I
 opted not to buy any because I felt like
we had a bunch. Hello, understatement.
 School supply
central a few weeks ago when I
wasn't sleeping late and I felt like
 I KNEW what everyone needed and I
 was on my A game.
Plus there was a school supply 
shortage in these parts, so look how lucky
my people are to have me organizing
our colored pencil inventory.
(In case you didn't read my last post - in the chaos that ensued I felt a little like the mom in Home Alone when they miss the flight and everyone is scrambling).

There were a few things that I would've done had I been awake earlier. When I asked Coach if he did the things he sort of snapped at me WELL, YOU WERE SLEEPING SO HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW? He had handled it, just not the way I would've. So whatever. Not a huge deal. I didn't know the world would stop if I wasn't downstairs by 6 am.

Mini:  (dressed in her tennis uniform for her after school match, she apparently forgot to set her alarm for school and was running late) I NEED NEW SHOES. TODAY. LIKE MY OTHER SHOES BROKE. I CAN'T WEAR THEM.

*I just bought her new running shoes but she told me to take them back, she didn't like them - she was fine with the shoes she was wearing, which were my OLD RUNNING SHOES. It then fell off my crowded radar. So now the back of the shoe sort of broke apart, not surprising. They'd dig into her heel if she tried to wear them. 

Mini:  JUST GIVE ME YOUR SHOES. YOU'RE DONE WITH YOUR RUN. YOU DON'T NEED THEM TODAY. 

Me: (while wearing my current running shoes) UM, NO I HAVEN'T GONE FOR MY RUN. I JUST WOKE UP. I HAVE MY SHOES ON BECAUSE I HAD TO GO OUTSIDE. I'M WEARING MY SHOES TODAY. I JUST HAVE WILHELM AND I WILL TAKE HIM FOR A WALK THEN DO MY STRENGTH CLASS. YOU CAN'T HAVE MY SHOES. (a moment later, as my brain started to wake up). OH, CURLY ALSO WEARS A NINE. SHE HAS TWO PAIRS. TAKE ONE OF HERS.

Reg:  (from across the room, as if on cue - Mini's problem solved, he was next) I JUST RAN OUT OF CONTACT LENSES. LIKE I ONLY HAVE ONE CONTACT FOR ONE EYE. I REALLY NEED MORE. CAN YOU GET THEM TODAY?

Not a great photo, but this
Yoda t-shirt says REAL
 THE STRUGGLE IS.
I was texting Tank to
 ask if he wanted me to
buy it for him. Maybe
 I should've bought it
for myself. More on
 Tank's college
drop off EVENTUALLY.
*he DID mention his need for contact lenses maybe a week ago, but if I don't add it to my list you may as well whisper it to me while I'm sleeping. Needs to be drilled into me while holding my undivided attention. 

When I'd gone outside to grab something, Lad pulled up. He hasn't been sleeping here much. He called something out to me. 

Me:  HUH?

Lad:  I SAID DON'T YOU EVER LOOK AT YOUR PHONE? I TEXTED YOU AT 5:30 AM. ANOTHER GUY IS GOING TO LOOK AT THE VAN AT TEN THIS MORNING SO YOU NEED TO FIGURE OUT IF YOU WANT IT. 

*Lad had called us last night to say that they found a van for us but in order to get it to their dealership the owner of the dealership where he works would have to buy it. The plan was for us to go test drive it first.

Me:  I have to attend an IEP meeting late this morning so I can't go at 10. Daddy's inside. Can you ask him what he thinks? 

This is when I realized that I'd left my phone charging in my bathroom, so confused was I to be waking up so late. Wilhelm's mom had texted too - deciding to keep W home for the day because of the hand foot mouth situation. So, I had a day off. There was no day-off happy dance - instead:  school meetings and a visit to a dealership, solo. 

Lad changed his tune: I didn't say another guy was looking at in at 10, I just want you to arrange a time to look at the car. 

I texted the Enterprise guy BE THERE AT 12:45. In the middle of the IEP meeting, the guy called. It was 10:23. He'd already sold the car. 

At least this spot isn't
as visible to neighbors.
Still. 
*backing up to when I was outside talking to Lad . . . he was attaching two kayaks to the top of his car. He recently bought them and decided to start storing them in the bushes at the sides of our house. Oh. Hmm.

Me:  WHOSE DOG IS THAT IN YOUR CAR? 

I noticed a dog sitting in the front seat of his car. I sincerely hope that he didn't get himself a dog. Hello, timing. He supposedly lives here (where his allergic mother resides), but we only see him lately when he's hungry or when he wants to store his kayaks or grab/dump some of his laundry. He claimed the dog is a friend's. 

No idea what's up with him. He tends to disappear consistently when we call him out on something though. And I did, recently, call him out on the fact that he wreaked of pot. He didn't like this - claimed it was because he'd cleaned out a customer's car at work - as if I'd buy that angle. Sometimes the truth hurts. 

Eye sore, anyone? Next to our
side-entry garage. Very visible.

Sometimes people need to get their acts together and not wait until their shoes, or contacts, or bad choices are sneaking up on them. I'd so prefer people not to have SO many demands or issues on THE.ONE.DAY.I.SLEEP.LATE. 

*The above all happened between 7 am and about 7:35 am. 

Really, maybe they could all go on vacation and I will hide out in the attic and be stuck here ALONE. Maybe my next video will be me recreating the Home Alone shaving cream scene. Don't hold your breath.


8 comments:

Nicole MacPherson said...

"I didn't know the world would stop if I wasn't downstairs by 6 am." - this is how I feel a lot of the time! Yeeeeesh, that's a lot of crap to deal with first thing in the morning!

Kari said...

I'm exhausted and I'm not living this. LOL

Ernie said...

Nicole - So funny. Look at us, living parallel lives. Only one of us is not up at like 4 am to do yoga. To think, I long to sleep in . . . but it ends up blowing up in my face. Feeling well rested is apparently over rated.

Ernie said...

Kari - It is exhausting. Adding a trip to buy sneakers and squeezing in an eye doc appointment now that school and babysitting and sports have started is challenging. Hello? Can someone else put something on their own damn radar for once? My radar is not high functioning at this point.

Pat Birnie said...

Wow - if my morning started like that it would not set me up foe a great day. Oh wait - it used to be like this for me every single morning!. It boggles the mind that kids think we can fulfill their every wish in the hour before school starts! So funny! And so convent that 3 of you wear the same size shoe!!

Ernie said...

Pat - Mornings are a little hectic and they do tend to think I can make their requests happen by magic if they mention them in the breakfast hour. Clueless. Some women don't like sharing shoes with daughters, but I see the 3 of us all wearing a 9 as a bonus. So often they need something dressy or specific for one occasion. Plus, I feel less guilty about buying a pair of shoes if I think WELL, THE GIRLS CAN WEAR THESE TOO. ;)

Busy Bee Suz said...

What time does your pencil store open? 7:30?

I'm not a morning person, so I prefer to NOT have anyone make ANY demands on me before 9:30. Heads would have rolled. How you do it and not end up in jail is beyond me.

The shoes. The Contacts. Yikes.
And still, the thought of H&F makes me gag a bit.

Ernie said...

Suz - Ha, yes - my pencil store is open bright and early. Can you even believe how many colored pencils I unearthed? Seems that SOMEONE had an entire storage room that went overlooked in the whole WHAT AREA OF THE HOUSE SHOULD WE ORGANIZE NEXT debate during lockdown.

I am not a morning person either. Go figure. Let me know when I can move in with you where people don't need to speak until mid-morning. I'll bring my colored pencil collection.

The shoes, the contacts, and THE DOG. Lad initially denied that he bought the dog. "IT'S MY FRIEND'S DOG." Yeah, no. It's his dog that he stores at his friend's place. Maybe on the bright side this means he'll move out sooner? I like to think only people who have a handle on their own stuff (and who don't live with allergic parents) should own dogs. Sigh. Of course the dog is cute.