We looked high and low for Mini's misplaced permit (this is a flash back to August 2019 - you might want to read the last few posts to be brought up to speed, or not). In the new hoodless kitchen, each kid has their own drawer. This seemed to make sense since the adjacent mudroom could not hold all of their crap. Leave something laying around, look for it in your drawer, because that is where I stick the stuff I think they need to keep track of. Mini claimed she had always put her permit back in her drawer.
By always, I refer to the less than 2 weeks that she owned a permit.
|This is the photo I snapped of the blue purse that|
I ended up buying for Mini n Greenville. I am sorry,
not sorry, that I didn't capture the pile of shit
I collected in the buy-it-back laundry basket deal.
You would have been appalled.
The girl will not carry a purse. She owns a few different purses, but they are too big or the wrong color, or something. While in Greenville (also in August '19), I bought her a purse. I sent her pictures - do you like this one? Blue - favorite color. Small size - just what she likes. Initially she could not find her phone to view the photos. THIS. is. the. issue. - she needed a purse to track her phone. Right?
These kids will not keep their ringers on, so when she misplaces her phone, calling it accomplishes nothing. Ed was home the day I called the landline while in the Greenville store trying to buy her a purse, ‘I am trying to get an answer from Mini about this purse. Ask her if she likes it?’
In the background I heard Mini, ‘I cannot find my phone.’ Exhibit A.
Ed about died laughing, because he knows my frustration with that overly used sentence. One day she was looking high and low for her phone. It was in the front pocket of the hoodie sweatshirt THAT SHE WAS WEARING. People, why must they torture me so?
She found her phone, liked the pics of the purse I sent, and I bought the purse. Done. So now she owns a purse, but it was a tad too late- she had lost the damn permit after 2 weeks. Save me. (edited to add: she NEVER uses that blue, Greenville purse after a year of owning it. People, no words. We were once in Von Maur browsing purses and the friendly saleslady started chatting with us. I explained my predicament with purse-less girl. The woman was like "How do you manage when you NEED a purse every, ya know, month?" I liked this friendly saleslady. Not pushy, and got right to the point. She and I should do lunch).
Coach came home in the midst of the permit search (he knew at this point that Tank had screwed up big time by not having his paperwork into the driver's teacher, so he and I were at the end of the same, thread-barren rope, just so you follow). He threw his arms up in the air, ‘What the hell?’
I told him I was torn. Should one of us drive back to the DMV in traffic and try to get her a permit, or should we roll the dice and wait for Tank to get the all clear on the website to get his license, which we were hoping might happen by the next morning. Then we could take both Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum back to the DMV at the same time.
The hesitation was that Mini had a scheduled drivers lesson set up for the next afternoon. She needed to have a permit for the lesson, and if we cancelled at the last minute we would need to pay a fine. Even if I made her pay for it - still such a waste.
As I am sure you have figured out by now, we are not exactly an on-the-ball-family when it comes to DMV requirements. Mini should have gotten her permit in the spring. That would have allowed her to schedule all of her official drivers lessons over the summer months. By the time we got around to getting her permit, there was only one slot left to have a driving lesson in the summer. We had to set up the rest on school nights when she juggles lots of homework and high school tennis.
I did not want to cancel the lesson. I did not want to pay a fine for canceling at the last minute. I did not want to make TWO more trips to the DMV.
Despite my insistence that we had already looked thru each one of the kids’ drawers, Coach looked again. The problem with giving a kid their own drawer, is that they pack junk into it and don’t bother to clean it out. In Mini’s case: EVER.
Coach worried that we could drive all the way to the DMV and end up getting turned away because the line might be too long to accommodate people showing up just before they closed. We decided to hope that Tank’s permit number showed up 'good-to-go' when we punched it into the website the next morning.
If it did, Mini’s best friend would come over to babysit World's-worst in Mini’s place. Then Tank and Mini and I would head to the DMV to hopefully grab a permit and a license. Unfortunately the next day was jam packed (HELLO AUGUST) and hoping for a DMV window might be too lofty.
Even though it is
February almost a year later, and I have had time to recover, as I re-read this my blood boils. I hope you join me as I detail how the next day unfolded in what would have been a million dollar reality television day had we been followed by cameras. Since you all seem to be busy on Fridays in the summer, and hey - that's not a bad thing . . . I am not going to post the conclusion to this on a Friday. It's a hilarious tale, and if it gets read it will make my heart happy. So, coming soon, when I think you are ready for it.