June 29, 2020

good grades form, Lamaze breathing and gentle parenting

(In case you missed the last post, you can read it here, or not . . . it's a pandemic and you have control over so little - I don't want to be bossy, just so you aren't confused, this took place in August 2019, carry on) . . . 

Coach and I arrived home from Greenville on a Monday evening.  As soon as I started plotting out the DMV adventure, Tank started to pace.  He texted Frank (driver ed teacher), who as Tank anticipated, texted him back to say don’t be scared, just relax and ask questions of the instructor so you know what is expected of you.  

Tank hoped to make it to a golf practice round for the high school team late morning the next day. My plan included getting to the DMV as early as possible, so the golf thing was a possibility.  Let’s be first in line.  Get ‘er done!  I told Tank I would come home after my early workout class and eat and we would leave by 6:50 am.  He agreed but assured me he would not sleep at all the night before.
Not sure if I shared that Coach and I tried mussels
 for the first time in Greenville.  They were delicious. 
After reading this story play out in the next
several posts, I assume you will wonder if
we had wished that we had just
 stayed in Greenville.  Forever.

As we were leaving that morning, I looked over my paperwork.  Then I remembered something.  ‘Hey, Tank!  Don’t forget that paper about your grades that I told you to put in your drawer.  Grab it and let’s go.’

Backing up the bus here a bit:  in April, Mini came home with a sheet from drivers ed.  ‘You have to sign this and then my counselor signs it to say I am not failing in school and I turn it back into drivers ed.  Tank probably got one too, and he needs to turn it in too.’  I copied the sheet that she handed me, signed them both, and lined up my two teen wanna-be drivers.  I told them to get it signed at school and turn it into drivers ed.  Stat.  Nodding.  Me repeating.  More nodding.  Me thinking it was done.

Early in the summer I got an email from drivers ed saying Tank never handed in the grade form.  Shock.  I called the drivers license place and they said he just needed to go get the sheet signed.  If they gave me other instructions, I do not recall.  This was before we left for Vancouver so it felt like a lifetime ago - from late June until early August.  

Mini assured me that Mr. Frank reiterated the importance of that 'good-grades paper' being handed in at the start of each class.  Since I am not a drivers ed student, I was not fully grasping protocol with the good-grades sheet.  I am letting myself off the hook because me telling him to get the damn form signed is where my involvement ends.

So here we were driving 25 minutes to the DMV (in August 2019) also known as the 3rd circle of Hell.  I began to suspect that Tank had taken a Lamaze class as he demonstrated deep breathing techniques in the passenger seat.  Being the gentle parent that I am (at times), I chose my words carefully and tried to reiterate what Mr. Frank had told him.  

Me:  ‘Just repeat what they want you to do.  Take a deep breath.  Getting worked up is going to cause you more trouble.  You will do fine.  Laddie failed his drivers test the first time but he passed it the next day.’  

We mostly drove in silence then, because I decided talking was not helping.  


Kari said...

I mean, breathing techniques DO work in stressful situations.

Busy Bee Suz said...

Oh good Lord. We know he didn't get the damn paper signed. Right? If that's the case, I'm super annoyed at him and he's not even my kid! LOL.

I have an apple watch and it tells me several times a day to stop and breathe. It's the hardest thing for me to do. Not the breathing cause I'm pretty good at that, it's the STOPPING and breathing.

Poor kid....he's all worked up and now I'm annoyed at him too. *giggle giggle*

I've never had mussels....they look a bit slimy and that's where I draw the line on my food.

Kara said...

Our high school doesn't offer Driver's Ed classes, so we had to pay for a private company for our oldest. For an extra $100, they'll do the driving test and take care of getting the license paperwork for the child. Best $100 I've ever spent. All we needed to do after she passed was to go to the 3rd Party office (it's a thing in AZ, you can go to a 3rd Party office and pay a little extra, but you don't actually have to go to the DMV) with the paperwork completed, and they take the picture and issue the license on the spot. My middle will be doing the same thing in September, provided the world returns to some type of normal.

Ernie said...

Kari - so true. Little did Tank know the DMV people were not to be feared as much as moi.

Suz - Oh, that form. That boy. If I didn't have Mini in the same class, I would have assumed the teacher had not explained things well enough. There are layers to this saga. I need a watch that reminds me I will survive the nonsense. I do not remember the mussels being slimy, and it has been almost a year since we ate them, so . . . hmm. I do remember being pleasantly surprised that I liked them. So you don't do slimy and you are crunchy based on your blog today. Got it.

Kara - I am incredibly envious of your ability to avoid the DMV. That place sucks the life out of me. I am not even allowed to bring in my water. Positively un-American. One more reason to move to Arizona.

Ally Bean said...

The DMV is one of those places that makes me worry even though I have no reason to worry. Deep breathing is a good way to handle it. We upgraded our Driver's Licenses last December to the new soon-to-be-mandatory ones you need if you want to fly between states. It looks us two trips to the DMV, two opportunities to stand in line, two deep breathing sessions, but we did it. Now, of course, it seems like the joke is on us-- where we going to fly to?

Ernie said...

Ally - I hate the DMV. There was a time when I got too many speeding tickets (shock, I know) and I lost my license for 7 weeks until we could get a few of the tickets thrown out. Spent more time at the DMV than I care to admit. Way to be ahead of the game with your updated licenses. I hope you can travel somewhere delightful sooner than expected.