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June 3, 2020

An unintentional head bonking, Joe's, dirty rice, & taco mourning

I do not have a photo of the finished cleaned garage, because there was an 'incident'.  

Coach was trying to put a shelf up on the garage wall that the kitchen workers knocked down 3 years ago.  No one could speak to him and ask him:  Where should we put this?  Do you still need this?  while he worked on the shelf hanging.


So:  lots of standing around.  My least favorite thing, while working on a project.  Finally, I reached up to grab something off of a high shelf.  So . . . the thing I grabbed didn't look like it was near where Coach and Mini were working on the shelf, but it knocked into something else that then fell and hit an empty milk crate and the milk crate fell TOWARDS where Coach was crouched over hanging the shelf and despite my screams . . . the corner bonked off of his head.  

It was like a game of PLINKO gone bad.  It bounced the wrong way.  Well, Coach was NOT happy.  Understandably.  I apologized profusely and then I abandoned ship.  I felt thrilled to have the shelf back, but I also thought that might have been better as a separate project since it was taking FOREVER.  

Aside from bonking Coach on the head, I also used my super powers to whip up SEVERAL meals over the weekend.  Now, we just have to remember to eat them so we don't have to throw any food away.  

At Costco I bought 10 pounds of ground beef last week.  I also bought a huge thing of pork chops AND I will be cooking them in my crock-pot Monday (writing this Sunday night).  No forgetting rotting meat this time.

Anyway, I browned a few pounds of ground beef Friday and tossed some pasta sauce in it for people to eat with pasta.  Then I prepared a few pounds for tacos, because I don't eat pasta, and Ed prefers tacos too.  Just call me a crowd pleaser.  

FINALLY, I made a little more than 5 pounds into Sloppy Joe's.  

My children behaved like it was Christmas morning when they heard Sloppy Joe's would be on the upcoming menu.  Even Lad, our resident vegetarian, decided to eat meat.  They ate them Sunday night and gave them rave reviews.  They were downright giddy.

Vat-o-Sloppy-Joe's
Note to self:  make Joe's from time to time and keep the children happy.  How hard?  

Of course I say this, but I assume you all experience the same thing:  make something they love once too many times in the same calendar year and be prepared for their wrath.  Like, sleep with one eye open.  What is the formula, anyway?  

While you ponder this, I will share that we have officially added dirty rice to our regular meals over here.  That was part of Ed's 'make-a-meal-Mommy-doesn't-make' pandemic adventure and it stuck.  Get it, rice?  Stuck?  I'll be here all week.  

The kids voted to keep Reg's recipe, pesto mozzarella chicken - shared by Beth, in the recipe rotation.  I have agreed, but I am conserving my chicken at the moment because it's hard to get - so they wait, patiently, because they are angels - in case you didn't realize.  

Served on a bed of lettuce for the celiac Mom.
When Ed made dirty rice, our mouths were on fire.  Crazy spicy.  Hello, have we met?  I don't do spicy.  Cut me some slack, please.  My mom is a very picky eater and raised us in her shadow - rarely making anything that wasn't meat and potatoes.  I didn't eat a taco until college, and even then I think it was AFTER college.  *** Moment of silence here for all the possible enjoyable taco eating years I missed out on. ***  Thank you.   

Anyway, my face was sweating when we ate Ed's dirty rice.  Then Ed and I made it again one night and I was in one of my let's-make-a-ton-of-shit-so-I-don't-have-to-cook-again-for-at-least-48-hours moods.  

It was a side dish and I was preparing something else while hollering over my shoulder things like:  Ed, add more rice.  I think I have another box of rice somewhere.  Let's make a whole other pan.  Get some more veggies cut up.  Let's do this.  


Well, I lost track of how many times we were multiplying the recipe and we just tossed in a bunch of paprika and cayenne pepper.  Lord have mercy, spicy.  My mouth was on fire and had to keep blotting my face - but eat it we did, because who knew when we would get rice again.  

At the time there were also shortages on gallons of milk.  I blinked wildly and begged them to stop, but my offspring gulped one full glass of milk after the other - splashing it carelessly down their chins- to calm the fire in their mouths.  Well, shit - that was a pandemic misfortune.  The equivalent to having a bad case of diarrhea early on when there was no spare toilet paper to be found, I guess.    

Third time is the charm. . . I was channeling my
 inner Goldilocks - it was JUST RIGHT!
I must share that last week I made ANOTHER mountain of dirty rice.  Some family members insisted they wanted it spicy.  Who even are they?  I agreed to make it spicy, but secretly winked at Curly.  She was with me - tone it the fuck down.  

I quadrupled it, but did not quadruple the spices and voila - perfection.  Even my sudden 'bring on the spice' people were completely satisfied, and for now I have cancelled my plan to go out and purchase a cow for the yard to keep up with our milk consumption.  Sort of sad about that, because let your imagination run wild with my plans for cow pies . . . you got it: 

"Special delivery for Mary Ann."  wink, wink, nudge, nudge. 

Now I just have to worry that my children will lynch my in my sleep once I have pushed the envelope and prepared dirty rice one two many times.  

ME:  Don't hurt me!  I will run out and get ground beef for Sloppy Joe's first thing tomorrow!   

(FYI:  I was trying to keep this post under 1,000 words and before I added this it was at 1,004 . . . like my dirty rice, not bad).

Do you like spicy, or not?  What did you not eat growing up that you later realized EVERYONE else was eating?

10 comments:

Beth Cotell said...

The pesto mozzarella chicken! I haven't made that in a long time. I need to add that to next week's menu!

My kids are the absolute WORST when it comes to loving something and then hating it. It typically happens on the 4th time I make something. They have eaten it and said they loved it and then "ummmmm....this isn't the best...." WHAT HAPPENED? I'll never know.

My husband always tells me that his mom had about 10 things she would make regularly (beef stew, lasagna, hamburgers, baked chicken, etc.) and would only occasionally switch things up by adding in a new recipe. He is always encouraging me to do that because he thinks it would make my life easier. But there's no way I could do that. There's only 4 of us and it is very rare that I find a dish all of us enjoy. I don't even think I could come up with 6 much less ten and if I did manage to find 10 dishes we all liked, it would only be a matter of months when they were deemed "ummmmm...this isn't the best...."

I love sloppy joes! But the few times I fed them to my kids when they were little they hated them. (What is wrong with my kids?) Now that they are teenagers, I should try then again.

Kara said...

My kids are now gone for the summer (thank you Mom & Dad for retiring early and wanting to take the kids for a couple of months). I have no concept on how to cook for just two people. We made a pork loin on last Wednesday, and then tried to use the leftovers on Sunday for pork fried rice. Except somehow the pork had turned bad, and I accused my husband of trying to kill me. Last night was tacos, and apparently somewhere along the line, the cheese had gone bad and it was my husband's turn to accuse me of trying to kill him. When the kids are around, we go through an unusually high amount of grated cheese. With no kids, we don't eat the 8 cups of cheese a week that they go through. He pulled some frozen meat out of the fridge last night, so tonight will be either spaghetti with meat sauce (frozen Italian sausage meat) or lamb chops that didn't get cooked at Easter.

My kids go through phases too. For a month or two, they'll want bagels for breakfast every day, so I get used to buying them. Then bagels fall out of favor, but I'm still used to buying them, so they just multiply until I pull them off the list.

Cheryl said...

My son and I like things a little spicy but my husband can't find anything too spicy. We will try something that he says isn't spicy and the boy and I are in tears while he insists that it isn't even hot. I can't imagine how you can cook for 8 people! My son and I aren't that particular about what we eat but my husband drives me crazy with all the debating about what to have for dinner! I remember growing up my dad would ask what was for dinner and my mom would tell him. He would say OK and that would be it, no big deal. I don't know why the husband cares so much about our meals.

Kari Wagner Hoban said...

So I never ate cheeseburgers growing up. I ate hamburgers but not CHEESEburgers. I thought cheese on a burger was disgusting until I was around 20. WEIRD, right?

To be the opposite of what you're asking, something I ate a lot of that I am learning not a lot of people love is meatloaf. I LOVE meatloaf. My mom made it bi-weekly all throughout my childhood. My husband, who is a meat and potatoes guy, hates meatloaf and never had it as a kid. I mean, wasn't that a 70s-80s staple??

Gigi said...

Oh gee - I haven't had sloppy joes in I don't know how many years! Those were on mom's rotation weekly, as I recall. I may have to nudge The Husband into making some.

I'm with Kari on the meatloaf - that was also on constant rotation. I think you are either in the love it or hate camp based on how it was made. My mom wasn't the best cook - but a leftover meatloaf sandwich is one of my favorite lunches.

Ernie said...

Beth - You are nice to your people, worrying about what everyone likes. I love that you have the answer: four times and then they are on the fence about a meal. I know I am a unique case because of celiac disease, but I eat the same things each day and my dinner food rotates a bit, but not as much as theirs does AND I AM FINE WITH IT. Kid you not, as I typed this post, Coach came into the study and was like: 'OH, THOSE JOE'S WERE SOOO GOOD.' It was downright comedic. Now, my sister has made sloppy joe's with a flavor pouch and my kids want to puke. Mine are full of chopped onions and green peppers and apparently some kind of secret drug I don't even know what - because my people were falling over each other to get more.

Kara - Tank's favorite question about dinner besides what are we eating, is 'Is it fresh?' since he hates leftovers. As if I would feed him rancid food. Exhausting. I can send him over to ask you if your food is fresh to remind you to check before you eat, but sounds like you just unloaded your kiddos. And, yes kids today - going off certain foods that they love with no warning. I ate the same bologna and cheese sandwich all through grade school. This is new territory to me.

Cheryl - Coach enjoys hot food, but he can at least admit that it is hot. He once ate the things (no idea, not my domain- some kind of pepper that is only supposed to be used in the cooking but removed for the eating) he was supposed to removed from his plate. Holy hell - his face was like a fire hydrant. He could not stop crying. I forget what the waiter brought him - like some kind of vegetable. I just sat there with my bland food wondering who would choose to set their head of fire? I cannot believe you have a guy who fusses over the food. Coach will eat anything (obviously) but even a little mold or a questionable date, snarfs it down.

Kari - HIlaroius about the hamburgers . . . no joke, we only ate hamburgers too, I think once again that my mom would only eat hamburger. When I worked at Burger King I would order my hamburger catsup only and my co-workers would have a field day with me. So plain Jane with the eating, but also very fetching in my faux corduroy brown uniform with fancy visor. MEATLOAF - my kids love it and I grew up eating it and it wasn't until a few years back that I caught wind of people mocking my childhood staple, like on movies and stuff. I was like, HUH? MEATLOAF ROCKS. I use my Mom's recipe and it has pork sausages in it and bacon draped over the top - maybe Mike needs this recipe if he is a true meatlover, and my kids are crazy about it. I usually only make that in the winter though because (insert my Mom's voice here): You know, it'll heat up the house to have the oven on for so long.

Gigi - Yes, get him to whip up a batch - serious comfort food because my kids have been genuflecting every time I enter a room since. :) As for meatloaf - so delish. We didn't have a micorwave when I was a kid - even when EVERYONE did, long story. My Mom heat up leftover meatloaf in a frying pan with a bit of tomato paste. It got dried out and it was gross. Otherwise, bring on the comfort foods that I can still eat (ala a little GF bread crumbs) and everyone is happy!

Busy Bee Suz said...

I'm not sure what's happening, but you are killing me with all your funny as hell posts. Keep em coming, I will not shank you in the middle of the night for MORE funny shit. I promise.

I used to make dirty rice when the girls were home, but never spicy because they can't handle it. We are sissies, well aside from the Coach.

I have such a time trying to figure out meals for two people, I don't know how the hell I did it for four and now I'm thinking you need a freaking GOLD medal.
Just in case you go heavy on the spice, we should start a go Fund Me for your cow.

I don't think I had tacos either until I was....hmmm... I don't know how old I was. I remember my Aunt (she's only 8 years older than I) taking my brother and I to a Mexican place and I used to order a Hot DOG. That is so wrong. I should be punished for such behavior and maybe I am in some way that I've not noticed yet.



Ernie said...

Suz- Aw, you thinking my posts are funny . . . DAY MADE. I mean I am climbing into bed here because tomorrow is an early morning bike riding at Coach's clinic day, but I am still counting it. Cuz I needed that today. Now I am wringing my hands trying to decide which tale to tell next (I have a list because shit keeps happening but no time to write everyday). I think it is so funny how our folks' eating habits impact our taste buds. Sissies- such a good way to describe those who fear the spicy factor. And, yes- I would love a cow.

Bibliomama said...

My kids are actually great for eating the same thing for extended periods of time. Curried chicken? Any time. Peanut chicken? Bring it on. The only thing they've ever gotten tired of was those chocolate-covered coconut cookies, and I was in a manic phase and made a LOT of them a LOT of timess. I was just trying to calculate how many turkey sandwiches I have made since lockdown began - it's probably approaching a hundred. I also cooked a buttload of ground beef a few days ago - taco meat and beef taco skillet, which is sort of sloppy joe-ish and Angus and I love it, Eve less so. I made honey chipotle meatballs last week and they were amazing. I have never made dirty rice, but the description of that meal was highly enjoyable and I think I might try now.

Ernie said...

Ali - My kids seem to never tire of anything covered in chocolate . . . just certain meals. Honey chipolte meatballs sound yummy. Thank goodness that there are so many meals that are somewhat time consuming that I do not make all that often, so they still get excited for those. Growing up, I think we ate the same thing every ding-dang week, and lots of it is stuff my kids now consider an after school snack. Yet we never complained. I don't think we knew that was an option.