Tranquil plus rude, and then home to slobs

I wanted to stand on a chair to get a better
 photo of the many volleyball courts,
 but I think you get the idea.
Oh, and our team won its
first set and then lost every other game.
All weekend.

I was in St. Louis over the weekend.  Tank played in a volleyball tournament.

I found it crazy that they scheduled this 3 day event the weekend BEFORE a three day weekend.  This caused kids to be pulled out of school and worker bee parents to take Monday off.  I cancelled two sitting jobs for Monday and paid almost $700 for 3 nights in a hotel.  We are new to volleyball (still missing high school water polo) and I had no idea that there could be so many nets, like 60, in one giant building.  Tank said there were more at McCormick place in Chicago the weekend Coach and I were in Dallas and he went with friends.  

All I can say:  bullet dodged.  

Tank wanted nothing to do with me.  He hung with his friends in the room across the hall.  One of the boys brought an xbox.  They didn't play until 3:30 Sat. and Sun.  Translation:  I enjoyed LOADS of quiet time to write.  So different from an Irish dancing weekend where we are up before 5 am and losing bags in cabs and chasing cabs through Orlando, etc.  

The workout facility at this Marriott was top notch, so I put myself through the paces of rigorous workouts.  

On the drive home, I subjected Tank to a tongue lashing that spanned several hundred miles.  Ouch.  

I just want to know what happened to the kid who was incredibly sweet, kind, appreciative, and considerate?  I told him through tears that I felt invisible all weekend.  (To you I will admit that I relished the tranquil time -for real, but my son acted rudely towards the person funding this entire weekend and I found that unacceptable).  

Tank drove down Friday after school with another mom and two other teammates.  Coach and I attended Mini's basketball game that went into overtime.  We lost by a point.  It was tough especially for my kid who played GREAT, but who missed two free throws towards the end of the game.  From there he and I bolted - took a 30 minute drive to Coach's sister's 50th birthday party. 

This event was organized by her husband.  He communicated with Coach.  (anyone see a red flag here?)  We both initially thought it was a surprise party and worried we would mess up the surprise by walking in with her if we arrived late after Mini's game.   Found out the day before that it was NOT a surprise.  I anticipated a room in the back of a bar with tables of heavy appetizers.  Not the case.  It was just Coach's siblings and spouses.  They were waiting for us to order dinner.  Oops.  I told Coach earlier to text bro in law and say, Hey we're already eaten, but he too thought that wouldn't matter because he figured it was a group thing.  

We knew we would be super late, so we ate some leftovers before we left.  I eat an early dinner to avoid sleep issues, especially when I have a big drive the next day.  They had ordered appetizers and told us not to worry.  When the girls were chatting at one end of the table, I apologized profusely but we all agreed this is the kind of mishap that takes place when men do the communicating.  

The next day sister-in-law texted me:  "Tell Tank thanks for sharing you.  Thanks for rearranging your weekend to celebrate with me. "  

I was driving to St. Louis Sat. morning when I got her text.  I laughed.  Tank was living his best life at that point.  They did not give the other mom and I adjoining rooms, but her room was across the hall from my room where Tank stayed that first night.  I put her name on my reservation so she could check Tank into my room.  My room was the party room that first night . . . when I was not in it.  Party as in:  xbox, snacks, scary movie, etc.  

I pointed out to sis-in-law no need to apologize.  Tank was going to be grumpy when I arrived since I was bringing food (the hotel did not have a free breakfast, and I do not have an unlimited budget).  No more eating out every meal.  No more xbox till 1 am. 

On Saturday and Sunday nights, he still met his friends out for dinner, but he ate the dinner that I packed first.  I told him to go ahead and eat out for the team lunch on Sunday.  After one of his games, I headed back to the hotel that was across the street.  He had to ref a game and then he was done for the  night.  He asked me if I would heat up his dinner when he was on his way back to the hotel so that he could hurry and eat it and then go to the restaurant with his buddies.  I told him that I would.  The microwave was on the 3rd floor and we were on the 9th floor.  

He texted an hour later:  "Heat up my dinner right now."  

Um, come again?  How about please?  I swear I don't even know who this kid is.  Please do not comment and say this is typical teenagers.  I do not care how teenagers behave.  I have teenagers.  (For the record Ed NEVER behaved this way.  Lad had his issues and might have been unappreciative or embarrassed if I brought all kids on a college visit, etc.)  I do not tolerate being treated this way.  I admit this kind of crap slips through the cracks when we are busy.  Tank thinks he has the keys to the teen car (only because older brothers aren't home) and he leaves a mess cannot be bothered to help around the house and just flies under the radar.  Well, in the calm of this weekend I had time to reflect. 

I think he got the message.  Game over for the world-revolves-around-me-and-what-I-want-to-do attitude.  I instructed him to go to Curly's school volleyball game with me and cheer for her when we got home from our road trip.  No idea how many of his games she has attended over the years. 

Oh, and he tried to tell me that he was going to drive home in the other car from St. Louis because it would be more fun.  Bully for fun.  I pulled the plug on that idea in a heartbeat.   I expect to see changes really fast.  Or else. 

I ordered 5 boxes and they polished two boxes
off since they were delivered Sunday.  And no
 one can throw away the box and the wrappers? 
Am I raising animals?  Maybe we
should send them to animal
 trainers in lieu of college.

In the meantime, I noticed last night between 5:00 volleyball, 7:00 my writers group, driving to and from Irish dancing 6:45-9:00 that two boxes of empty girl scout cookies were sitting on the island.  No one bothered to throw them away.  

Coach worked late.  Neither of us had a cookie (only because I can't).  We are refusing to toss the boxes in the trash.  We invited each kid to admit to eating the last cookie in either box and to apologize for leaving it out.  All we got was:  "Not me."   Times 4.  It is hard for me to clean up the kitchen and leave the boxes and wrappers sitting there, but I am holding out.  Damn it.

Curly aka my-own-personal Velcro was very happy to see me when I showed up to the school for her 5:00 game.  All hugs and kisses.  

I admitted to her later that night when I looked around the kitchen (that was not in horrible going-to-buy-ping-pong-table condition, mind you.  Just regular clean up stuff) that I wanted to go back to my hotel.