May 27, 2019

my name here on out: the reluctant candy shopper

Here I was just using Joann's to cover all of my needs for the evening.  B-day gift, team candy, and art project supply.  Things started to unravel when the checkout line was lengthy.  I had ventured further from dancing than I usually do for errands.  This might not end well.

At the front of the line, the young checker dude saw me fumble with my phone and he pointed out that the only way to call a coupon up on my phone was to download the Joann's app.  Shame on Joann.  I don't want an app to Joann's on my phone (yes, I am 80 - thanks for asking), plus my battery was almost dead.

This is the better wood that we
get at Micheal's. It's hard to see here,
 but it has some bark on
 the sides, which makes it look cool.
Kudos to this dude who kept trying to find a coupon that would work to no avail.  He never begged me to complete my order and get the Hell out of the store - even though I wish he would have.  People were sending me hate mail with their eyeballs in the line behind me and I needed to get back to dancing.  I opted to make a return trip to the store with the receipt once I found a coupon at home on my messy counter-tops.  Just what I love, another trip on another day.  I ended up putting some of the astronomically priced checkout candy back and left the store at 8:27.  Dancing would end in 3 minutes and I was about 10 minutes away.  Drat. 

I arrived at the studio to see the lights out and Curly waiting outside with a teenage assistant teacher.  I apologized profusely out the window as Curly hopped in the van, which was pretty much still in motion.

Then I sped away and instructed Curly not to talk to me.  I was now officially grouchy.  At stop lights I texted Mini to say that the candy crap was out of control.  I would be alerting the athletic director of my frustration.  Mini was good enough to point out that I was insane.

Mini did not like the wood pieces from Joann's.  I agreed with her.  They were lame and not like the ones we prefer from Michael's.  Oh well, I knew I was making a return trip.  Just leave that bag of wood to return on the counter with the rest of life's messes.

The next day at dinner Ed called out to Mini:  'Sorry about the candy.  Did you get it?'  Mini kind of mumbled something inaudible and I could tell she was flustered.  I was only half listening, but then a light-bulb went off in my dizzy-from-chasing-my-tail-around head. 

me:  'Mini did you forget that freaking candy at our house after I bought it last night?'
Mini (unable to look at me):  'Thanks,.Ed!  I told you in my text not to tell Mommy!'
Ed:  'Oh, sorry, I didn't see that part of the text.'

Mini had inadvertently pulled what we, her loving family members, refer to as 'a Mini moment.'  she babysat for a baby I sit for over the weekend.  When the mom dropped off on Monday, she brought along Mini's coat that Mini left at their house.

I just found Mini's bag of candy from her
badminton big sis.  Ridiculousness!! 
Am I right?
Mini had to be at school early the day after the candy buying emergency.  When she got to school she realized that she forgot the bag of big sis candy and texted Ed to bring it.  Ed didn't see the text in time.

I, the reluctant candy shopper, drove right past the school on the forgot-the-candy day with the tots.  I could have stopped and dropped the candy.  OR - I could have purchased not-ridiculously-over-priced candy at the grocery store, which is where I was going with the tots, and returned the other candy later at Joann's since I had to go back to Joann's anyway to do the coupon thing and return the yucky wood.

If looks could kill, Ed would not stand a chance.  And, if girl team-building could include colorful hand drawn notes/posters taped to lockers from well-wishing teammates, then I would stop threatening to embarrass the Hell our of Mini by voicing my disgust to the athletic director.


Kari said...

I hate store apps. Like, I am cheap but definitely not loyal.
To the store. Not in general.

Ernie said...

I think I am turning into my mother - a new age version. My mother is very proud of the fact that she has never sent an email, gotten a speeding ticket, drank coffee, tasted beer, visited the doctor (like practically since giving birth), used GPS, etc. She is only 77. So, my version is this: I do not download apps (at least not without my teenagers helping me and only when I have a very necessary cause).

Can't wait to hear about Florida!