November 13, 2017

When the gift horse's mouth spits at you

Such exciting news must be shared.  The contractor paid to have a cleaning service clean our house Friday.  Typically this happens at the very end of the job.  It's funny to say 'end' and 'job' in the same sentence.  Could it happen?  On Wednesday we will have been without a kitchen for 12 weeks.

Anyway, they decided to give our house an additional, earlier cleaning.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe they felt bad for creating so much dust.  Maybe there was guilt that the job is dragging on for so long.  Maybe they noticed that our house has a built-in disaster area component, and they recognized it as a cry for help.  Not wanting to ask a dumb question, and certainly not wanting to look a gift horse in the mouth, I just said, 'Awesome!'

So, the timing was both good and bad.  How great to have a cleaning service right after I had so many kids puke!  I did scrub those bathrooms, but another round of cleaning wasn't a bad thing.  Besides, these people are professionals.

I don't usually babysit on Fridays, but of course I was asked weeks ago to sit on Friday the 10th and I agreed.  My grade school kids were also off of school, which didn't really feel like a day off because they were home sick anyway.  The biggest barfer of all, Tank, was home from high school, too.  So the down side to getting the house spic and span was that there were so many additional bodies to deal with.
Exhibit A:  This is Curly, who slept on the basement floor while her room was being serviced.
I requested that they start in Eddie's bedroom, so I could put a tot in there to nap the instant they were done.  In order to stay one step ahead of the cleaning crew, I had to usher the sickos from various rooms despite their lack of energy.  Tank was sound asleep in my bed when they started cleaning my room.  He had so many blankets piled on that they didn't even notice him at first.  Since he wins the prize for the highest number of hurls, he could barely walk when I dragged him back to his room.

Before they arrived, there was some confusion about what was getting cleaned.  Originally I thought they were going to only clean the rooms adjacent to the construction zone.  The family room took the hardest hit.  Don't get me wrong, that drywall dust was EVERYWHERE - it did not discriminate.  Earlier in the week, the head construction guy told me they would clean the first floor.

While Mini was dancing her butt off
at her private lesson, I ran
to the grocery store to purchase the
sick kid necessities:  vitamin water,
Popsicles, bananas, bread
 (for dry toast -yum), and chicken noodle soup.
I took Mini to a private lesson for Irish dancing in the morning because Midwest championships are in two weeks.  Curly was supposed to split the hour lesson, but the timing of her stomach bug eliminated her from participating.  While at dancing, I texted the kitchen designer about the cleanup.  She informed me that it would not be limited to the first floor, but the hired service would include the entire house.

Just the day before I took one for the team, and emptied the girls' closet.  Stacks of clothes everywhere.  We were mid-way thru the process of determining what fits who, what is worth saving, and how tight skinny jeans can be before they become um, offensive.  For Curly, it was like Christmas morning as she dug thru the bins of Mini's former wardrobe.  Mini sat and commented on EVERY item:  'Oh my gosh, I wore that in 6th grade and it already fits her?!'  (Curly is in 4th grade and now wears a size 12 jeans).  Mini has always been crazy tall.  Lately Curly has reached freak-of-nature-tall status.

Who was going to clear a path for the hired crew?  They were supposed to arrive about 30 minutes before I would return from this confound-it dance lesson.  My head was spinning.

Folks, I saw stars . . .

(I'm not really trying to create a cliff hanger here, but this post got to be too lengthy, so I am sharing the conclusion with you tomorrow.  I urge you to check back to see how I survived trying to make the best of this amazing opportunity -short of tossing our hard-earned clutter out on the lawn.  I have pictures!  I'd love your feedback - leave me a comment and let me know:  would you prefer a marathon post, or a two-day deal like this?)


Beth (A Mom's Life) said...

I always like a good cliffhanger!

Ernie said...

Well, I think you will find the rest of this story pretty entertaining. I hope so anyway. The office manager at Coach's work has often said we should have a reality series. That wouldn't work - they'd have to bleep me out too much, but if ever there should've been a camera in the house!